Blurry Lines
by rOcKeRfOoL
Summary: He promised forever, I believed him, he lied. They took me away, but we had a plan. Five years later I've found him, just as we planned, but he's moved on. Now what? Pre-teen love, promises broken and love lost. I want him back... one day.
1. Separation

**Blurry Lines **

**Chapter One:  
><strong>_**Isabella**_

"No! No! I won't go. I can't leave you." I admitted, finally letting myself break down.

It just now hit me; I might not see him again, ever. "Shh, it'll be fine baby, you'll see. We'll see each other again, just like we planed. Nothing will change. In five years we'll see each other again. We'll meet at the entrance; I'll be there just like we planned for it, five years babe, five years. We knew this would happen, that's why we planned for it; five years babe, five years."

I nodded in understanding, my mind taking in his reassurance, but my heart, my heart's bolting at the reality of leaving him.

"What if…what if you change your mind? What if you forget?" I asked much to my horror. The thought made me cling to him tighter.

"Never," He answered immediately, not missing a heartbeat to think his reply through. "Isabella never; you are the most important _person, thing, matter_ in my life. You are _'it'_ for me, Bella; no one else, ever. Now listen to me. You can't doubt me or yourself right now. You have to believe in our plan baby, you have too, because I won't lose you too baby, I won't. So tell me the plan." He asked desperately.

"We will go to high school, we will not joke around and we will not party. We will work our ass's off to get a 4.0 G.P.A. We will apply to three colleges." I recited like clockwork.

"Good baby, now tell me which colleges?" he asked as he placed a few of my loose curls behind my ears.

"Dartmouth, Harvard, and Princeton University. We will be accepted to all of them, but the only one that matters to us is Dartmouth. The others are just for precaution, for our 'parents' sake. In five years we will meet in front of the Collis building, on the front steps. You will kiss me, and get down on one knee and ask me to marry you. I will say yes and we will get an apartment together, never having to separate again. We will start our life together and I will bare your children; three of them and we'll have a dog, because I've always wanted one. We'll be happy and we'll grow old together. We'll be happy." I repeated, the thought and images bring a small, weak smile to my tear driven face.

"We'll be happy." He repeated assuringly.

As his mouth opened to speak again there was a squeal of tires turning the corner; we both looked up to see the unavoidable vehicle finally approaching. I grabbed his shirt tighter, pulling him to my chest.

I was panicking, frantically, desperately trying to connect every inch of my body to his, but he stayed calm. "Do you have my shirts and pillow?" he asked softly, his velvet voice caressing my ear. I nodded hysterically. "Okay, I don't know how long my scent will last on those things Bell, but I hope they help as long as they can."

He knew his scent calmed me completely so he offered to let me have his pillow and a few of his shirts. To preserve the scent –his scent- I folded them as small as possible and put them in Ziploc bag.

"They will." I assured him.

He bent down to place a chastise kiss on my lips, but when the sound of the dreaded car stopped in front of us his kiss became more forceful, pouring every ounce of love, adoration, and passion he had for me, for us, in it.

I returned it with just as much fervor until I was literally yanked away from his grip. "No!" I cried out, as I fought against the restraining arms that held me tightly. "You're hurting me, stop it! Edward!"

Edward had stood there, watching the unavoidable happen, but when my cries of pain came out, he was bounding over to me with a look of ferocity. "Let go of her!" He demanded. "You're hurting her, let her go! Get your fucking hands off of her!"

"Edward!" Yelled his new father-Doctor Cullen- from the sidewalk, as he ran to intercept Edwards advance on Phil, my 'mothers' new toy.

But he was too slow. Edward crossed the small space that remained between us, his fist balled and his voice deadly. "I said let her go." He threatened through clenched teeth.

With a devilish grin Phil grabbed me tighter, making me yelp in pain. "I said let her go!" Edward yelled once again as his right fist came up and connected with Phil's left jaw bone.

Once Phil fell I launched myself at Edward, grabbing him tightly. "It's okay baby, I have you. I have you and you're fine." He squeezed me tightly to his body and I cried in his chest.

"Edward?" Carlisle called, upset. "She has to-"

"I know, she knows, we know, okay? Shit!" he exclaimed angrily. "Carlisle there has to be something, something you can do."

"Isabella!" screamed Renee as she knelt down in front of Phil. I cringed and grabbed Edward tighter.

"Carlisle please, I haven't asked you for anything, ever. Since the day you bought me here, us here, we've never asked for anything. You have to help her. She won't survive them, and I won't survive losing her."

"I'm sorry Edward." Carlisle whispered weakly. "But she's her birth mother. I have no rights, this was just a half way house for Isabella. We knew this would happen, we knew they'd come for her, you knew. Now you have to say goodbye, you don't have much time."

Edward nodded resolutely, turning me away from everyone. He grabbed my chin and lifted my head so my eyes were completely on his. He lifted his lips into my favorite crooked smile and smiled down at me. "Bella, Bella, she can do it, she can do what no one can." He sung. It was something he'd made up when we were little. Every time I said I couldn't he'd sing that for me and I'd do it, because he was there for me, with faith in his heart. "With all of my heart I will love you. I will give it to you and no one else, because you've already had it. All of your life you've had it, right here." He said pressing his palm to my chest. "Take care of it until I can have it back, please take care of it; forever my Bella."

"Forever…my Edward. I love you."

"I love you too." He whispered softly, leaning in to place his soft lips to mine one last time….

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

"Bella wake your ass up! You're going to be late!" My annoying, small, spirited roommate yelled, again. Tell me again how I got stuck with this girl for a roommate? Oh yeah, that's right, I'm unlucky. Don't get me wrong, I love the Pixie, but god she's annoying.

"Alice, it's too early."

"It's too early to reunite with the love of your life? Come on Bella, we over slept. We only have two hours to get there."

With a surprised gasp I jumped out of my bed, grabbed my toiletries and ran for the bathroom.

Today's the day. I've waited five long years for this day and it's finally here. Years ago-like last night- I would dream of the past when he and I made this pact, this agreement. We were kids, but we knew there was no one else but each other. Some people wait forever to find their soul mate, I'd only had to wait thirteen years to find him, two years to truly fall in love with him, and five years to get him back. But today's the day, and I'm going to cherish it for the rest of my life.

I stepped out of my shower, wrapping my body in one of Alice's fuzzy, soft, pink towels, only to come face to face with the little _minx_ herself. "You sit here," she commanded as she grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the chair in front of my vanity. "while I work to give antique boy a glimpse of his very sexy future." I blushed and nodded my head in consent.

Alice is a goddess at make-over's. Sometimes she goes overboard when I would favor her keeping it simple, but she knows what I like and dislike, so this time I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. And hopefully there will be no doubt in the end.

After an hour of getting my hair pulled and curled I was finally ready to put my clothing on. I wanted something simple, A nice pair of dark blue jeans and a simple 'hang off your shoulders' dark red blouse, but no.

I walked out of the bathroom, my freshly made soft curls swaying delicately as I did, and into my room to see an outfit that was so inappropriate for my first day of college, and my first time in five years to see Edward, lying on my bed.

"You're nuts!" I shrieked at Alice as she walked in behind me.

"I knew you would say that, but-"

"But nothing Alice!" I screeched, interrupting her 'buts,' 'ands' and 'ifs' before they could emerge from her mouth. "This is wholly inapt. This outfit is for Halloween, or maybe clubbing _during_ Halloween, but it's not for the first day of college and I refuse to wear it."

"But Bella!" she cried in a whine six-year-old girl voice. "It'll knock him dead."

"Not if I die first of heat stroke." I replied sarcastically.

The outfit itself was beautiful, don't get me wrong, but come on. There was a gray silk shirt that started as the base of the outfit, and then to cover that was a gray white stripe shirt. Over that was a black corset that's meant to hold the fabric tight to my torso. To cover up down below there was a gray silk skirt that stopped just above my knees. For my legs there were black fish net stockings with small barely there mini holes, which held a beautiful design in the fabric. See, beautiful, just no first day of school beautiful.

"I'm going to get you into that outfit one of these days Swan, just you wait and see."

I have no doubt in the back of my head that she will in fact be getting me into that outfit. What worried me is that it might not be for Halloween.

After she relented she went into my closet and pulled out an outfit close to what I had envisioned; A dark pair of tight fitting, black jeans, with an off the shoulder, dark green cashmere sweater. Alice finished the ensemble with a pair of dark green flats and a pair of black studs. I felt beautiful, and most importantly I felt confident.

"Lets go get him Swan." Alice whispered as she backed out of the room.

With one last look at myself I followed behind her, ready to once again follow my heart.

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

It was hot. Hotter then I thought possible, but that didn't stop me. Today I'm finally going to get my life back, my world, my Edward.

Alice and I walked across campus, headed solely for the Collis building. Alice was in the lead since I'd never seen the building outside of pictures. She'd taken the tour of the campus weeks before. She told me that she'd taken it because she wanted to be prepared for any fashion emergency we may encounter. When I told her I didn't understand how school tours tie into fashion, she simply said she'd tell me about it later.

I never spoke of it again.

Above Alice's tiny frame I could make out the large building before us with a large 'Welcome Home' banner tied around the pillars. But my eyes didn't stay focused on the building for long. I immediately began to search the crowd for that once familiar shade of bronze mess.

My eyes roamed and roamed, but still there was nothing. And then it hit me; maybe he dyed his hair, maybe he's a blond now, or a red head. It's possible. So I reached the stairs, and I stood there, and I waited, just like planned.

Alice stayed with me, no questions asked. She's the world's greatest friend. I'd met her on my first day of high school. I was the new girl, the amusement, the shiny toy, and she was nice. She walked right up to me and said; 'Hi, I'm Alice. I know, you're Bella, you're going to be my best friend.' And so I was, from that day forwards I was and still am known as Alice's best friend.

"I don't think he's coming." I stated sullenly, as I glanced at my watch.

"Did you guys have a time limit?" Alice asked as she too glanced down at her watch.

"No, but I don't want to be late on my first day of class. I want my teachers to like me."

"Fine, lets-"

And there it was, like a star shooting across the sky in slow motion he moved through the crowd. It was him, of that I was positive. His hair, the same shade of the bronze penny I kept under my pillow. His eyes still the same bright jade green that hunts me in my dreams in the sweetest way, that's him, my Edward.

He moved through the crowed with a purpose. His steps measured, and his eyes searching. I wanted to scream out to him that I was here, standing right here, but I was stunned silent. He was just as beautiful as the last day I saw him. And he was going to be mine forever.

I took a step forwards, one step, only to be pulled back by the small arm of Alice. I turned to see Alice shacking her head sadly at me, her eyes, glazing with unshed tears. "I'm so sorry Bella."

"For what?" I asked befuddled. She nodded her head in Edwards direction and I swung around just in time to see a beautiful strawberry blond jump into his arms. "Oh," Was the only syllable that left my mouth. "Of course." I whispered seconds later.

"Come on." Alice said, grabbing my hand and pulling me down the stairs.

Here is where everything went wrong. Edward and…_that_ girl were positioned at the bottom of the steps, the very steps that held the key to my escape. So when Alice grabbed my hand and began pulling me down the stairs, of course I tripped before I reached the bottom, and of course I snagged Edwards shirt on my bag, and of course I took him down with me.

"Are you okay?" his velvety voice asked as he helped pick up my books.

"She's fine." Alice answered for me. "I'll take those," she said, reaching for my books. He placed them gently in her hands and turned his attention back to me. I let my hair fall in my face, providing myself with a thick shield.

"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked me once more, the concern in his voice irritating me. How could he be concerned about me when there was another woman in his arms?

"I'm fine Edward!" I snapped acidly.

"Fine, I was just- wait a sec, how do you know my name? Who are you?"

"B, lets just go." Alice pleaded, purposefully not using my name. "He's not worth it."

"What do you mean?" He asked, directing his question towards Alice. "Who are you people?"

"Edward?" a soft tenor called. I glanced up from under my hair to see the strawberry blond take hold of his hand. "What's going on?"

"I'm not sure babe, but they know me somehow. Who _are_ you people?" he asked once more, his voice a little bit demanding. I cringed at the endearment he used. He used to call me that all the time. I was his _babe_, once upon a time.

Sucking up my fear, and anger, and disappointment I lifted my head and came face to face with the green eyed monster. When our eyes met, his took a moment to focus, but when they did, boy did comprehension hit him. He sucked in a hard breath, his face going pale.

"Hello," I murmured. "I'm-"

"Bella?" He breathed. I nodded once, letting him know that it was in fact me.

"Hello," the blonde greeted, holding her left hand out. I thought it was odd, until I saw it. It was big, gold, and shiny; stupid diamond ring owner. "I'm Edward's fiancée, Tanya Denali."

I stood there for a moment, staring gaped mouth at her ring covered finger, until I felt a small shove from my right side, Alice.

"Hi," I greeted taking her hand. "I'm a stupid girl from the past who believes in promises that were made by fourteen-year-old boys. It's nice to have met you Tanya Denali. I wish you every bit of happiness I so foolishly believed I would be receiving today. Have a nice day."

I turned; taking Alice's offered hand and walked away from a past of lies.

"I'm proud of you." Alice whispered.

"For what?" I asked surprised. "What is there to be proud of? Half of my life has been me, pinning over a prepubescent boy who made a weak promise that I just knew he wouldn't keep. Even after he promised he would, I just knew he wouldn't, Alice. But I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I was so stupid."

"Too credulous? Yeah. Stupid? No Bella. You wanted to believe that true love existed, and you had a right to. This is his fault, _his_. He did this, he broke your faith. But you're going to get over this. You're going to be just fine."

"God Alice, I feel like I gave up everything for him. I didn't date; I didn't get to experience things regular teenage girls got to, like dances and parties. I even saved myself for him. God, what am I going to do with that?"

"You are going to fall in love again, Bella. You are going to find that special guy and give him your 'special' gift. And I know just the place for you to look. Come on, we're going to be late for class."

**AN:****So I just disappeared and I'm sorry about that. But now I'm back and yes, I have something **_**New**_** for you guys. And also yes, I will be finishing every single story I have on here. I just had to step away for a while. But now I'm back. Hopefully there are no gaps in this story. I have like ever chapter done. It's just the editing and posting that needs to be done. I hope you guys like it!**


	2. Nice Little Drinks called 'Shots'

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Two**_

_**Isabella**_

Everything seemed to be passing in super speed since the events from earlier occurred. This morning's chemistry class went by like a burning match. Physics went by at the same speed, and so did Mathematics. I couldn't even function enough to sit down and have a normal lunch with Alice. She pretended like she didn't notice, but she's Alice, so I know she did.

In my Expository Writing class I actually managed to make conversation with a blond, not strawberry, thank god. Her name was Rosalie. Rosalie Hale and she's a sophomore. She actually came up to me, which was surprising since I know I looked far from approachable.

But she was kind, and I think I needed that. Either way she knows my story now. It was like a reflex to just blurt it out to her. When everything was all said and done, she looked completely overwhelmed, but then she started blurting out stuff like; 'limp dick asshole' and 'dickward' and 'chauvinistic douche bag.' I think I'm going to like here a lot.

She's going to come out with me and Alice tonight. There's already a frat party at dusk that Alice found out about before lunch. This is where I'm supposed to find the new 'love of my life.' I think not.

Besides, I don't want love; that hurts too much.

My Biology class was canceled for today, the note on the door stating that the professor was still away, but class would certainly be in session tomorrow.

My last three classes, biochemistry, molecular biology, and calculus-based physics looked like they were going to be a breeze once the year really kicked off. All in all I felt really confident in my ability to complete each of my classes at the top of my class.

Or so I thought.

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

"I told you I would get you into this outfit." Alice exclaimed with a satisfied smirk. "I even got you into a pair of heels. Tonight's going to be a blast." she sung as she skipped out of my room and into hers.

I could only pray that she be right about this.

Rosalie came over to our place, looking like sex on legs, and coming from me, the virgin, that has to mean something. I'd be surprised if all eyes didn't turn to her immediately when we walk in. But just as that thought passed through my mind Alice walked out in all her glory.

What is the name of that chilly pepper, you know, the spiciest one in the world- Bhut Jolokia? Well that was Alice in her silver booty cut dress. She left absolutely nothing to the imagination and my god, some bastard is going to get really lucky with her tonight.

"Hi, I'm Alice. You must be Rosalie?" Alice introduced as she walked over to Rose.

"Yeah, that's me. And might I add; that dress is hot."

"You really think so?" Alice asked excitedly.

"Oh yeah, Alice." I interrupted before Rose got sucked into one of Alice's quest to fulfillment. "Why don't we get going before it gets too late?"

"Or before they run out of the good shit." Rose retorted.

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

It took us less then twenty minutes to get to the frat house by foot and let me tell you about those twenty minutes in these death traps. First I tripped coming down the apartment stairs, then I tripped when we reached the side walk right in front of the apartment building. Oh, lets not forget the sixteen times I tripped walking to this stupid frat party and of course the four times I tripped because I thought the dark clouds were interesting. After the first time you would have thought I would have gotten the point and just looked away, but no.

I've just been completely out of it since earlier. I still can't get the image of him and her, together out of my brain. I just can't believe I was that stupid and wasted so much time on a fourteen year old boy's bullshit. But not tonight; tonight I'm going to have fun. Tonight, I'm going to live my life for me.

Walking into the party was a new experience for me. I'd never been to a party before so I didn't know what to expect. I guess you can say I was a little naïve as to what I thought a proper college party would be like. Yes, naïve is a very good word. Because what I thought would be a few friends and a few drinks is in actuality a few kegs and a few or more dozen friends, with spiked watermelon and delicious little drinks called shots.

I was on my fifth shot when I saw Alice in the corner with a handsome blonde. I don't quite understand what they were doing; Alice was just standing there staring at the guy, while the guy practically mimicked her. Where they differ was the eyes. Alice's eyes held fascination, and dare I say it, adoration? While his seemed to hold an immense curiosity.

Their moment seemed so precious and private that any sober person would have looked away, yet me in my intoxicated state couldn't help but look at something so rare, something so innocent and beautiful. Something I'll never have.

I turned away harshly, my eyes landing on a group of frat boys running around the room in their underwear. Is this really what college is all about; parties, and drinking and sex? I didn't sign up for this. I came here for one thing, or shall I say person? I could have gone to any college, with my grades, my GPA, I could have gone anywhere, but I came here.

I turned back around to go to Alice, to tell here that I wanted out, but I ended up running myself smack-dab in to a strong, defined chest. "Sorry, I guess I wasn't watching where I was going. Are you all right?" I nodded my head, my fingers raking through my curls as I backed away from the stranger. "You sure?" he asked again.

I looked up then, my eyes meeting a pair of gemstone blues. "I'm fine." I assured him, my face instantly getting hotter as his eyes racked down my body and back up to my eyes.

"I'm James." He introduced, offering his hand in greeting.

"Bella."

"Well Bella, it's nice to meet you? Can I get you anything, a _shot_ perhaps?" the twinkle in his eyes had me instantly entranced, but the words that left his mouth, the hint of amusement that lingered in those words. It made me think he knew my choice without my say.

"No, I was just leaving."

"Leaving? Well that's too bad. I thought maybe we could talk for awhile. Do you have to go?"

"I guess I don't have to, but-"

"That's great." He bellowed, interrupting me and taking my hand.

I pulled my hand away and finished my sentence. "But I don't want to be here. I'm sorry but I'm leaving."

He caught my hand again, this time a little more securely. "Look, it's late and at these hours of the night you don't know who's out there. Did you come with anyone?" his voice now held a hint of concern which took me by surprise.

"Friends." I confirmed.

"That's good, great actually. Where are they?" I hunched my shoulders as I looked around the room for Alice's familiar spikes or Rosalie's blonde mane, but there was no sign of them, not even the boy that Alice was with minutes ago.

"I don't know where they are. It's okay, I'll be fine on my own, I just really don't want to be here."

"No, it won't be okay. I'll walk you. Where is your dorm?"

"No, I'll be fine I assure-"

"Look, I'm a pretty stubborn guy; I usually get what I want so why don't you please just let me walk you to your dorm? That way I know you got their safe and I won't stay up worrying about you."

After a few more minutes of protest and the perfect stare off, I conceded and let him walk me to my apartment.

It was nice. I learned a lot about James Hunters, like one, he's not from a solitary unambiguous area. His father was in the military so he and his mother saw most of the world during his fathers' active duty. Or two, he watched the Power Rangers until he was sixteen. I laughed at that. Three, his favorite color is red. I asked him why and he said it's the color of his little sister-Victoria's hair. I thought that was sweet. He seemed perfect, and I wanted to pinch myself for almost missing this opportunity to get to know him.

"So, we're here."

"Yeah, I guess we are." We stood there for a few awkward moments, neither one of us making an effort to speak or move. I finally had it with the silence and went for it. "Would you like to come up?" I offered.

He looked at me, his eyes a lapis lazuli blue now. He stared at me for a long time, longer then our silence went on, like he didn't hear me or something. I was beginning to feel rejected, yet again. Just when I was about to withdraw my offer, he spoke.

"Maybe some other time, but not tonight." I nodded my head, feeling just as rejected as I did earlier. "Um, I was actually wondering if, maybe you would like to go out to lunch with me tomorrow?' he asked softly.

"Really?" I asked stunned.

He chuckled quietly and nodded twice in conformation.

"Yes, I would like that. I would like that a lot. Should I meet you somewhere, or….?"

"Um, do you think you'll be free around eleven-eleven thirty?"

"My last class before lunch ends at around eleven so I could meet you in the cafeteria and we can go from there."

"Sounds great, I'll see you tomorrow Bella."

"Goodnight James."

"Goodnight."

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

"So where did you disappear to missy?" Alice asked as she swatted my butt with the damp dish towel.

My head was pounding and the ending 'pop' from the effect of the dish towel hitting my bum had me groaning in pain. "Alice, please keep it down."

"Someone can't hold her alcohol. Where did you go B? Rose and I looked everywhere for you and you were missing in action."

"I may have, possibly, kind of met someone last night."

"What?" she screeched. "Give me the details. What's his name? Where's he from? Hair color, eyes-"

"Alice, volume." I whined.

"Come on B, you can't say something like that and just not give me the tails."

"Okay fine. If you stay quiet I'll give you all the details and something extra."

She made the motion of zipping her mouth and locking it with an imaginary set of keys, and then she tossed the key behind her.

"Okay, his name is James. James Hunters and he's a sophomore. He's twenty years old and he's apart of the frat house that gave the party last night. He has one mother, Jane, a little sister, Victoria, and his father Demetri is in the military, Army. He has blue eyes, but when he's…I guess excited, they turn a lapis lazuli blue. His hair is blonde, as far as I could tell he's a natural. God Ally, he was beautiful.

Alice jumped from her chair, running behind it and falling to the floor on her hands and knees. I stared on in confusion as she patted the carpet for whatever she'd lost.

"Alice," I called after a while. "What are you looking for?"

"The key to this damn lock on my mouth." I laughed loudly, making my head hurt more.

"You're nuts Al, just tell me what you have to say."

"Fine," she stood and walked back to her seat, opting to stand behind it this time instead of sitting. "I think he sounds perfect, which concerns me a little."

"How so?"

"Think about it, he's a sophomore which means he's been here for a while, so why is he single?"

"I don't know, maybe he hasn't found the right girl yet, or maybe he's too wrapped up in his studies. Does it matter, I liked him and I think that maybe there could be something there."

She nodded her head, her eyes unfocused and glazed. "What was the little something extra you had for me?" she asked after her eyes focused on me again.

"Well, he asked me out for lunch today, and I sort of said yes."

"That's great B, really. So what are you going to wear?"

"Alice!" I whined louder.

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

"Hey!" James hollered from across the student center where he sat with a table full of frat boys. I made my way over to him in the black skin tight skirt and zebra print pumps that Alice insisted that I wear with one of my off the shoulder white blouses. I felt ridicules and a tad bit unpleasant.

"Hi James," I greeted as he stood to embrace me, my eyes only on him, for I was too embarrassed to look at his 'brothers.'

"Bella," He whispered as he hugged me. "I'm sorry, they saw me sitting here and just invited themselves. We could go if you want to?" I shook my head as he leaned away from me to grasp my reaction.

"No, it's fine."

"Are you sure?" I nodded my head in affirmation. "Okay then. Um Bella, I would like you to meet a few of my frat brothers, this is Mike, Jasper, Emmett, Garrett, Laurent, Peter, Felix, Alec and of course Edward."

My head stood on end when _his_ name escaped James's mouth. You have got to be kidding me. Wait, that name is fairly common, it can be anyone, I just have to look…Nope, it's him. It's unquestionably him.

"It's nice to meet you guys, I'm Isabella." I shook all of their hands, saving Edward for last. I was dreading touching him. I wanted nothing to do with him; I'd come to that conclusion last night and now….

After shaking Alec's hand I slowly moved over to Edward and held my hand out shakingly. He took it in his and we both immediately snatched them away from each other. There was a shock so painful that it had my arms chilling and the hair that covered my body standing on end.

"Nice to see you." He whispered, flexing his fingers slightly.

"Yeah, same here." I walked back over to James, taking the seat next to him. This is going to be a long, unforgettable lunch.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I hope you guys like the second chapter...<strong>


	3. My World Just Became More Complicated

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Three**_

_**Edward**_

It was her. Five years of nothing and suddenly she is everywhere.

I don't know how I didn't recognize her. I always told myself that if I were to ever see her again I would just know it was her. But I didn't know. I didn't know that the beautiful brunette with the deep coffee brown eyes was her. God, she grew even more beautifully in my absents.

My absents…Five years….

There is no excuse for not waiting for her like I promised. I swore to her that she were the only one, that she were '_it_' for me, and I showed up to _our_ meeting place, where _our_ futures were supposed to begin with Tanya De-freaking-nali.

First thing everyone needs to know, I _am_ engaged to Tanya. Yes, we get into it _a lot_ and yes sometimes I want to flush her head down my toilet, but I love the girl none-the-less. It was only right to ask her to marry me after two years of being in a relationship. It was the next thing for us.

Tanya was there for me when no ones else was. At first she was a hand full, a nuisance, someone who followed me without regard. Even when I still claimed Bella as mine, Tanya refused to give up. Then my brain started working in over time, mouthing off things like, Bella will move on, she'll forget about me. She probably already has. It wasn't real to her, my feelings; she won't wait for them, for me.

After that, I didn't stop to think again. I just accepted the fact that she wouldn't wait. So I tried to move on, even though the very thought of being with another girl made me sick. But after awhile I got over the feeling and started living my life. I dated casually throughout high school, never being intimate with anyone. Then Tanya De-freaking-nali went away one school year and came back the next year with boobs. And guess who she wanted to touch them?

I was in haven as far as teenage boys could be, but still she never got what she really wanted from me, even to this day, I remain a virgin. I just never felt right-and this is going to make me sound like a total bitch- but none of those girls, not even Tanya half the time, turned me on.

I'm never in a state of arousal when Tanya's demonstrating what I'll be having for the rest of my life in the middle of her bed. We just don't have 'it', but it was only right to take the next step in my life with Tanya since she's been there for me.

But then we got to college and I run in to _her_, the very girl I'd given up on ever seeing again and she was here. And unlike me, she seemed to have waited, and remembered me and knew instantly, without me having to say anything that I was who I was supposed to be. But then she saw Tanya's left hand, and she spoke of my promise and how it was a lie. She spoke of how foolish she was to believe in a fourteen-year-old boy. The anguish on her face made my heart squeeze and pump faster. She had waited and believed in me and I'd given up on her. I'm an idiot.

My day had dragged as I thought back on my morning every chance I got. I couldn't believe the events that took place. I couldn't believe I saw her again, after all this time. Seeing her was more then I could have ever asked for. She looked so beautiful, she seemed unharmed, and if she made it to Dartmouth, she must be smart. I guess Renee and Phil treated her right after all.

My classes flew by; one was canceled due to the professor being absent, I was relived. I really needed some time to myself to think. I was kind of nervous, and excited for night fall. The guys in my frat decided to have a welcome back party, celebrating the return of another great year, for them. I was just excited to be apart of it.

The party was great; it started out feral and got even more untamed. It was wild and surprisingly I was enjoying myself, but then _she_ walked in. She was beautiful in her gray skirt and gray and white strip shirt. She seemed to fumble a bit in her shoes, and I couldn't help but smirk a bit at the irony. Who would put her in heels? She was so uncoordinated when I knew her.

"Cullen!" came Emmett's loud bellow and his giant paw on my back. I winced from the instant pain it caused. Emmett's one of my favorite brothers here at Delta Pi Omega "What are you looking at?" he followed my eyes, his growing bigger as he took her in. "She's hot man, but aren't you _engaged_?" he mocked.

"Yeah, aren't you engaged?" Came another voice from behind us. We both turned and came face to face with James Hunters. I don't like him. From the first moment I saw him I didn't like him, he didn't even want me in the frat. Emmett and another brother Jasper, sat down with me one day and told me how hard they had to fight to get me in, because even though I'm a _legacy_ James tried hard to get the guys to look over me, stating that Carlisle wasn't my real father, there for I wasn't a real _legacy_.

"Yeah, she's just a girl I knew from my childhood. I haven't seen her in a couple of years, but it seems like I've seen her none stop today."

"Man she is hot. Is she single?" James asked as his eyes racked over Bella's body. I felt my face drain of blood and my fist tighten as he checked her out. I had the sudden urge to go over to Isabella and drag her out of this party caveman style.

"No…I mean yes…I mean I don't know." I answered truthfully after a bit of hesitation.

"Gee Cullen, thanks a lot. I know, why don't I just go find out, or did you have dibs?"

"No James, I don't have _dibs_," I spat. "she's not a fucking plaything." I stormed away from the both of them, my mind and body heating up. God I hate that pompous ass. I hope that Isabella's smart enough to see through his bullshit and leave him cold.

~0o~0o~0o~0o~0o~

I guess she wasn't smart enough. I thought as she made her way through the crowded cafeteria to James. She kept her head down, watching her feet most likely, god she's beautiful. She didn't look at the table when she reached it, she looked up only at James, who smiled and introduced everyone at the table. When my name left James's lips…god.

She froze, I think everyone at the table noticed it, but no one commented. She looked away from James, her eyes meeting mine almost instantly. She shook it off, introducing herself individually to all the guys, and then she came to me. I don't know what to say except for, what the fuck!

She touched me and I instantly felt a volt move up my arm, numbing my muscles for a minute, making my hand unmovable then it wore off. I flexed my fingers, and greeted her back before she took the empty seat next to James.

"So Bella, when we were talking last night you said you were from Arizona?" James asked. I tuned everything out, but their conversation. I wanted to know about her life with those incompetent people just as much as he did.

"Yes, I lived there with my mother and her husband for a while. Then when I turned eighteen I moved in with my best friend Alice and her family."

There was movement beside me and I looked over to see Jasper sit up straighter. "Alice?" he asked. "Alice Brandon?"

Bella nodded her head and looked at Jasper curiously. "Blonde hair." She murmured then looked up as someone yelled her name. "Um, actually, there she is now."

I looked over to see a small little thing walking towards Bella with a tall blonde-haired girl behind her. I remember seeing the small girl yesterday with Bella. "Bella," she called as she reached the table. "I thought you were going out for lunch." She then looked around the table, her eyes landing on me and narrowing before they landed on Jasper and widen. "Jasper?"

"Alice." Jasper whispered in greeting. The guys at the table looked from Jasper to Alice in awe. Jasper isn't what you would call loquacious.

"Would you ladies like to join us?" Emmett bellowed as he held out the seat next to him for the tall blonde-haired girl.

"Sure." Alice agreed, skipping over to Jasper. Jasper stood and held the seat next to him out for the small ball of energy.

"So, what were you guys talking about?" Alice asked.

"Oh, we were just getting to know Bella better." James answered. "She was just telling us how she moved in with you and your family when you walked in."

"Really?" Alice asked surprised, her eyes widening a bit. "Bella are-"

"It's fine." Bella assured her quickly, taking a swift glance at me. "Um, I was saying how I moved in with you and your family, and then we graduated and moved here for school, the end."

No, not the end, what isn't she telling? "And how was Renee?" my mouth asked before my brain caught up.

The others at the table looked at me than again at Bella. She looked at me, seemingly pleading with me not to ask too much. I was interested in how they treated her, but I wouldn't ask anything else of her here. I nodded once, signaling her that I understand.

"She was Renee." She answered with finally.

"So you two know each other, Edward, Bella?" Jasper asked.

"We used to." Bella whispered just loud enough for everyone at the table to hear.

James took her hand in his, the movement catching my eye immediately. I stared at their joined hands, my vision turning red. "Edward?" came Tanya's familiar voice. I looked up to see her walk over with Kate, Garrets girl.

"Hey baby." I greeted as I stood to hold out her chair. "What have you been up to today?" I was only half-interested as she talked about picking things out for the wedding. My mind was still on James hand as it was attached to _my_ Isabella.

"…so do you?" My ears caught as I tuned back into Tanya.

"Do I what?" I asked confused.

"Do you want to have the dinner at my parents' house or your parents' house?"

"Mine, Esme would really like to give you at least that."

"Esme?" Bella murmured.

The table glanced at her, her cheeks growing warm from the attention. "Oh yes, it's you; the girl from yesterday. I thought you looked familiar. Yes Esme, Edwards' mother."

"I know who she is." Bella stated. "She was my mother as well, for a short period, at least I thought of her as such."

Tanya stared at Bella, than at me, back and forwards, back and forwards; everyone at the table playing this game of tennis as well. "How exactly do you know Edward and the Cullens…?"

"I, um…." Bella trailed off, looking from Alice to me for a little help.

"Baby, you know how Carlisle and Esme adopted me, how their place used to be a safe haven for kids? Well Bella and I are from the same town, the same safe haven if you will."

"So you were adopted too?" Tanya asked Bella directly.

"Sort of," Bella said before clearing her throat and sitting up straighter. "Um," she looked at James too, making sure he heard as well as everyone else.

"Bella, you don't have to, I mean, we don't even know these people." Alice advised her glaring at Tanya.

"Isabella," I called, her familiar name rolling off my tongue as if I'd never stopped saying it. "she's right."

"I'm fine," she assured us. "this is fine." I nodded once, giving her a reassuring smile, letting her know that I was here for her. "Um, I'm from a small town called Forks, Washington on the Olympic Peninsula, and so is Edward, as you know. My father and I used to live there when I was a little girl. I grew up as the towns' mascot, of sorts. My dad was Charlie Swan, Chief of Police and I went with him everywhere, so everyone knew me, the cop kid they'd call me.

"Um, one day my dad got this call, a disturbance out in La push; the local reservation on the Peninsula. It sounded serious, so he um, he left me with the Cullen's. My dad and they were old friends, Esme was always like a mother to me and Carlisle was like a second father.

"The same day my dad dropped me off Carlisle had just returned from one of his trips to the hospital, Edward was with him. I kissed my dad good luck and then I followed Carlisle and Edward into the house.

"My dad was gone for a long time, a really long time. I started to worry, a lot; at one point I got myself so worked up, I started to cry. I hid in the music room at that time. That's where Edward first found me; in the music room sitting at the piano crying my eyes out. He just sat next to me, didn't say a word for almost an hour.

"I fell asleep on the piano bench, not waking up until the next morning. I woke up on the floor next to Edward. He'd stayed with me through the night. That morning, when we went to breakfast, and my dad still wasn't there I just knew…I didn't even have to see Esme's tear ridden face to know, I just knew in my gut that my father wasn't coming back for me.

"I stayed with the Cullen's for about two years. With their help, and Edwards I finally got over my fathers death. When we were older, um the Cullen's adopted Edward, but they couldn't adopt me because my mother was still out there. They needed her consent, and she wouldn't give it. I mean, she didn't even care about me; she just didn't want anyone else to have me, and especially not Esme Cullen. God, I would think that you would appreciate the woman who practically raised your kid while you were out and about, but no, not _Renee Dwyer_." She spat.

"Bella?" I called, seeing the tears well up in her eyes. When her eyes met mine, one slid down her cheek and I knew she'd had enough. "Come on." I said standing and walking over to her chair.

"Edward?" Tanya hissed. "What are you doing?"

I glared at her, my instinct to protect Bella, the same instinct from all those years ago, kicking in.

"He has to," Bella's friend Alice spoke. "I never could, now I know why." She turned to look at Tanya, her eyes narrowing. "Don't worry, _she_ doesn't want to still your fiancé from you, Tanya was it? He's just the only one that knows what to do right now. Take her." Alice said as she turned back to me and handed me a set of keys.

I nodded my thanks, took Bella's hand, and led her out of the crowded cafeteria.

My world just became more complicated.


	4. The Absolute One Thing

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Four**_

_**Edward**_

"Where are you taking me Edward?" Bella asked as I reversed out of my parking spot and drove away from the school.

"My place."

"Why?" she asked nervously.

"We need to talk." I stated simply.

"No, we don't." I looked sideways at her, is she nuts? Of course we need to talk.

"Bella-"

"No, look," she said interrupting me. "I know you think that you have to explain your life to me, but you don't. What happened between us was years ago. We were kids, and when we were together everything seemed to go away, so when we made those plans we didn't even consider the obstacles we'd have to overcome to actually carry them out to the end.

"Five years is along time Edward, we're different people, we've been through things and obviously we survived so for that I'm grateful. You're happy now, and you're in love, and that's beautiful, honestly it is. I wouldn't wish anything less for you. So just don't, don't bring the past into your future."

"So that's it, I'll never tell you why, you'll never want to know why?" she nodded her head slowly. "So I'll get married and you'll…?"

"I'll find who I'm supposed to be with in life. Find the guy I'll marry, one day. I'll be happy for an old friend, and live my life the best way I can."

"Is James going to be apart of that new life of yours?" the question escaped before I could reel in the venom, or the accusation.

"So what I thought was correct?" she asked amused.

"What are you talking about?"

"When he touched me you sort of glared at him. You don't like him very much do you?"

"I was that noticeable?"

"Just to me." She giggled. "You still do that 'I'll kill you' glare.' That used to be hilarious. Still is by the way. Esme used to-" She broke off, her eyes far away in the past.

"She missed you, you know? She still does."

"I missed her too."

"She um…she keeps this photo of us on the mantel over the fire place. I didn't even know she'd taken it, but she had. It was a few days after we'd both gotten there, we were sitting in the music room on the Piano bench and I was playing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' for you.

"She'd caught the moment you laid your head on my shoulder. The picture came out really nice. She made me a copy, and you. God, she had a lot of pictures of us around the house, but as time grew on…something clicked in her one day Bella. I came home to boxes in the foyer one evening. I got nervous because I though someone was leaving or maybe they were kicking me out, but when I looked into the boxes there was only pictures, of me and you, but mostly you. That's when I realized she couldn't do it anymore, she couldn't fake it."

"What do you mean fake it? Why would she have to fake anything?"

"When Renee took you, Esme was hysterical. She made Carlisle look for lawyer after lawyer hoping to get different advice, which was that you could come back to us. But each one told them the same thing, which was Renee, was your birthmother and there wasn't anything they could do about that.

"Esme got so tired of hearing it that she went to a few of her friends that were judges. When they said the same thing, there was nothing else for her to do, but keep you in her heart of course, and in her memories, and of course in the millions of photos she had of you. So she went on with trying to live her life. She'd try to smile but then she'd turn around and see a picture of you and break down into tears.

"That day I came home and found the pictures of you, I knew she was at her breaking point. She took all of them down, all but the one of us in the music room. When I asked her why not that one, why all of the rest but not that one? She simply told me to remember. I still don't get it."

There was a sniffle, and I looked over to see Bella crying once again. She quickly tried to swab at her tears, but they wouldn't stop falling.

"You honestly don't remember do you?" I looked at her puzzled, and shook my head."It was seven days. We'd been there for seven days and the police came over to tell Carlisle and Esme they couldn't find Renee. I didn't want to hear it so I left the room without a word and went into the music room. I sat at the bench and stared at the keys, desperately wishing I could play. I'd started to cry when a set of arms came around my waist and pulled me closer to the body that I didn't even know was there, it was you, Edward. You sat with me for forever and let me cry all over your Jedi shirt. When I'd calmed down you asked me not to be sad and I told you that I couldn't help it."

"That's right, I told you that everything would be okay, that I would take care of you and no one would ever hurt you again. You told me no one had hurt you, that someone had hurt your dad, and that you missed him a lot."

"And then I started pounding on the piano keys and screaming at it to let me play it. You laughed and said that you would play it for me. I didn't believe you knew how at first, but when your fingers moved across those keys. Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder where you are….

"You played for me all night, the same song on repeat. I never got tired of it. Then I slowly laid my head on your shoulder and wrapped my arms around your torso. I closed my eyes and sighed contently for the first time in seven days. I had no idea she'd photographed it."

"You should go down and visit them you know. When ever you get the chance, a weekend, a vacation. They would love to see you, Bella."

"How am I supposed to do that? How am I supposed to just show up at their doorstep?"

"Just go, they'd welcome you, you know they would. It would give Esme closure. I still see the sadness in her eyes when she looks at that photo of us. You'd put her worrying at ease."

"I'll thank about it, but I want something from you Edward."

"What?" I asked hesitantly.

"I want you to keep me a secret from them. I don't want you to tell them that I'm here. If you told them, you'd get their hopes up about me seeing them, and if I decided I couldn't do it, it would hurt them, so please, don't tell them that I'm here."

"Isabella…."

"Just please, give me your word on that Edward, please?" she pleaded.

"Fine, but I want you to honestly consider going to see them."

"I will." She promised.

"So what now?"

"Um, I live right up there." She pointed to the******East Wheelock Cluster** building and I switched lanes to get to the right side of the road. Once the car was safely in park we sat there in silence.

"I wish you would let me explain." I murmured.

"Are you happy?" she asked. I nodded my head, looking into her eyes. "Then stay happy Edward. Don't let your past ruin it for you. Tanya, she seems like a lovely girl Edward. I always knew you'd end up with a lovely girl, you deserve it. I'm gonna go. I have a feeling Alice will be home soon."

She made to open the door, but I grabbed her hand quickly, trying desperately to prolong the moment, but also wanting to warn her about James. "What's wrong?" She asked.

"I need you to promise _me_ something now Isabella."

"What?"

"James-"

"Edward-" she began.

"Bella please, just hear me out." After a contemplative second, she motioned for me to continue. "I know he made himself sound like a good guy, but honestly Bella, he's not. Since I've known him, I've had this bad feeling about him, like something is completely off about him. I just want you to promise me that you'll be careful with him, that if anything feels off to you you'll end it. If he tries to force you into anything, if he doesn't take no for an answer, if he ever puts a hand on you, you'll end it. Promise me."

She nodded her head, slipping her right leg out of the car. "I'll end it. And you'll be the first to know." She promised before she completely slipped out of the car and walked up the pathway to her dorm.

**-~~'\\%/'~~-**

I drove around for two hours after I dropped Bella off at her dorm, my thoughts running a mock as I thought back on our conversations and our promises. I wondered if she would really tell me if James tried anything with her that she found offensive. I decided if she kept her word for five years then she would probably do it again, because she was a good person like that. But could I keep my promise to her and not tell Esme and Carlisle that I'd found her-well, that she'd found me?

It felt wrong to keep this from them, but Bella was right, it would hurt them much more if they knew she was here and safe and she refused to see them. Why she'd do that-why she'd refuse was beyond me.

I finally made it to my apartment around sunset, my mind burnt out from the issues of the day. This on top of pre-med is going to finish me this year.

As I walked into my apartment, I had the sudden feeling that I was not alone. I flicked on my lights and came face to face with my very pissed fiancé. "Where have you been?" she demanded.

"I was driving around Tanya, thinking."

"With that _Bella_ girl?" she sneered.

"I was with Bella at first. I calmed her down, then we talked for a while, but I dropped her off at her dorm not long after we left the cafeteria. Why?"

"She's the same Bella, isn't she?" she asked annoyingly.

"Yes Tanya. She's the same Bella. Where are you going with this? So she's the same one, what does it matter?"

"What does it matter?" she mocked. "It matters that _my_ fiancé just bailed on me in front of most of our friends to tend to his _ex_-girlfriend. It matters that _you_ left me there feeling stupid. It matters that _you_ were with her, for only god knows how long, and you didn't call or come back to the cafeteria. So don't you ask me 'what does it matter,' because it matters a damn lot Edward Anthony."

"Fine, I'm sorry okay? So she's my ex-girlfriend, _from when I was fourteen_ Tanya. I haven't seen or spoken with her for _five years_. And she needed me today, I owed her at least that much. Now I'm sorry I embarrassed you, and I'm sorry I bailed, but you-you just don't understand.

"Isabella and I…we're different from most people. For a long time I needed her and she needed me and that's all we knew. Sure we had Carlisle and Esme, but it was just _us_ that we could count on. She calmed me the way no one else ever could, and I did the same for her, and today she needed that.

"When she was taken away from me I thought I would die, you have no idea how it feels to lose the absolute _one thing_ you care about in this world. To watch it stripped from your arms and plead with you to save it and knowing you couldn't. No matter how much you wanted to, you just couldn't.

"You have no idea how it felt to see them throw her in the back of their car and drive her out of my life. So yeah, I bailed on you, and I'm sorry, but she needed me and for the first time in five years I could do something about it. I wasn't that weak fourteen-year-old boy who stood by and watched them rip his world apart. I was the grown man who saw the girl who was once his everything tearing up inside and for the first time I could do something about it, so I did.

"When she was telling our story Tanya-"

"Stop!" she commanded rigidly. "Just stop. I don't want to hear this anymore. Do you think that if you tell me this, if you tell me how much that girl meant to you that I would be okay with what you did? Because it doesn't make it okay, Edward. Look, I'm going to ask you for one favor, then I am going to tell you something that you need to hear.

"I'm going to ask you, for _me_, for the girl you love _now_, to stay away from Isabella Swan. Then I'm going to tell you that she was not telling both her and your story, she was only telling _hers_. And the fact that you can still- without question- mix your life with hers, shows me that a part of you-even after_ five_ _years_- still wants to be with her.

"Then I'm going to say that you went five years without her, and you fell in love with me. I'm sure you could go three more years without her so we could start our life, our family Edward. Then, I'm going to tell you that if you can't stay away from her then yes, I _will_ know how it feels to lose the absolute _one thing_ I care about in this world. Because I know if you can't stay away from her, I'll lose you. We deserve our happiness Edward; please give me what I deserve."


	5. It's not you it's me?

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Five**_

_**Isabella**_

Yesterday I was stunned and very appreciative of Edward. The way he protected me, got me out of there before I completely lost my cool. It reminded me of old times. The days where he would swoop in and save me from whatever predicament, I found myself in. He was always there for me and I'm glade that at least he kept that promise.

Today however…I don't really know what's going on today. It's like I woke up in a parallel universe.

I saw Edward after I exited my first period class, he was walking down the hall, not five people in front of me so I called his name and he heard me. I know he did because he turned to face me. He stared at me for two long seconds, and then he walked away from me.

I saw him again at lunch. I was sitting at the same table with the same people from yesterday when he entered. Emmett called him over and he started to walk towards us, that was until his eyes scanned the table and landed on me. His steps faltered and then he just turned and walked away. I sunk further into my chair because I just knew I was the cause for his weird behavior.

And if the incident in the cafeteria didn't prove me right, my missing professor finally showed up for class today. So the class was certainly taking place as every other class of mine has been doing all week.

I was among the first five people to enter the class, our teacher Mr. Eleazar, explaining his absents to us. He was half way through his story when I looked up and saw that the class was nearly full. So he cut his story short, got to the point and began telling us what to expect for this year.

He told us twenty-five percent of this class was lab, twenty-five percent was attendance, twenty-five percent was homework and the other twenty-five percent was tests. He told us to pick a lab partner and say hello to our best friend for the rest of the year.

I was nervous as I watched the student's pair up, that was until someone I knew entered the class, Edward. Mr. Eleazar admonished Edward on his tardiness and told him to pick a partner. I waved at him, and he looked at me. I smiled and waved him over, but he lowered his head and sat where he stood; next to a short guy with glasses and brownish hair. I was so confused, but I had to hide my feelings as a girl, tall and brunette came up to me.

"Hi, my name is Angela Webber. Do you think you would like to be my lab partner?"

I smiled warmly at her and motioned to the seat next to me. "I'm Bella Swan, nice to meet you."

Angela was a pleasant girl, smart and very beautiful. She didn't consider herself to be any of the things that I considered her to be, and I was interested to know why. She wouldn't tell me though, so I filed it away for later.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Class ended an hour later and while I was walking out I had the best idea I'd had all day concerning Edward. I was going to wait for him by the door and drag him somewhere to demand that he tell me what his problem was.

So I waited, and I waited. After fifteen minutes I was about to give up, but that's when the door opened and you know who walked out. He looked around, searching for something, or some_one_, not seeing me standing against the pillar. When he thought the trail was clear he exited the class and that's when I moved in.

I grabbed his arm and dragged him as he protested. My grip was firm though and I refused to break it. He was being really rotten and I wanted to know why. When I came to an empty corridor I let him go and I turned around to face him head on.

"What is going on Edward? I'm so confused, did I do something wrong yesterday? Was it what I talked about at lunch with your friends? If I embarrassed you I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."

Running his fingers through his hair, and pinching the bridge of his nose he groaned loudly. "Look Isabella," he said as he looked down his nose at me his tone making me flinch. For the first time in Edward's presence I felt small. "It's not what you did, it's not what you said, it's not you at all, it's me-"

"Don't, don't you dare use that preposterous line on me. 'It's not you it's me?' Can you even use that line on someone you're not dating? God Edward, how could you be doing this right now? Just when I thought I had you back in my life you do this. What, is it that you don't want your screwed up past to interfere with your perfect little present in more than just one way? Am I not good enough to be around such sovereigns? You know what, just don't answer that. But let me tell you something Mr. _Edward_ _Cullen_. Not too long ago, you were just like me, the only difference is you got out and I was shoved aside like some basket case. So don't you act all mighty and moral like you're better than me because you're not.

"I can't believe I actually waited five years for someone like you. You turned in to the very people I scorn. You know what; go on, snub me like I don't exist. I'll stay out of your way and you'll stay out of mine. It shouldn't be too hard. We went without each other for five years, what's a few more."

I stormed away, knocking my shoulder into his as I went. The bastard has some nerve. I can't believe I bought into his lies yet again. What kind of idiot am I? God, I hope I never have to see him again.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

So much for me wishing.

It seemed like everywhere I went for weeks Edward Cullen was there. We continued to fail to acknowledge one another, our friends noticing our tenacity about keeping a distance. When we're anywhere near each other, others could easily pick up on the animosity and I was sorry for that, but I refuse to talk to that asshole.

James seemed to be beyond ecstatic about the hostility between Edward and I. He supports my decision to stay away from him even though he doesn't know one detail about why I'd come to make that decision.

He and I were actually doing really good these days. When I wasn't spending time with Alice or Rose- which wasn't often because Alice was seeing Jasper and Rose was getting chased by Emmett- I was spending most of my time with James.

He'd brought me to the frat house a few times, introducing me to more of his 'brothers' and showing me around his room. We'd always end up making out on his bed, but we never went further than that and he seemed to respect my decision to wait.

One afternoon when I was at the frat house with James, we'd just walked out of his room for a break from our usual make-out session and ran directly into Edward and his fiancée Tanya. I tried to go around them, ignoring them like I've been doing, but James felt the need to spring up a conversation. I walked away with a; 'I'll be in the kitchen _babe'_ over my shoulder.

When James finally joined me in the kitchen he appeared to be quiet, a little nervous, and too remote. "What happened?" I had asked him. Usually he'd be wrapped around my body by now.

"Um, I sort of agreed to something you might not agree with." He murmured so low I nearly missed it all.

"And what would that be?" I asked cautiously.

"A triple date with your friend Alice and my boy Jasper. She also invited Tanya, and Edward." He stilled himself, awaiting my rebuke.

"Why James? I've gone weeks without talking to him and you're going to put me in a position where I _have_ to talk to him or hear him talk. I don't want to go. I'm sorry, but no."

"Babe," he cooed. "if I had my way you and I would be doing something a lot more fun than going to dinner with Cullen and his chick, but Alice is in control of this outing. You might want to talk to her." I melted into him, pouting as he hugged me tightly to his frame. Why me?

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Alice was not relenting.

That's what I learned from begging her for nearly two hours. Alice didn't seem to care about my issues at the moment. She was so wrapped up in making this night perfect for Jasper that she refused to let me even tell her what I wouldn't weeks ago about why Edward and I were fighting. She seemed to be on this 'I want everything to be prefect trip' and for the first time since meeting Alice she was really pissing me off.

"Alice!" I yelled coldly, my tone catching her off guard. "Would you just stop and listen to me. I don't want to go to your dinner. I don't want to sit there and have to pretend to like someone that I don't. Why didn't you just ask me instead of going behind my back and asking James?"

"Because you would have said no, and _he_ wants to get on my good side. Look B. I know something is going on between you and Edward, something you don't want to talk about, but this is a good idea. You can show up to this dinner in something that will make him drool, and sit right across from him and show him that no matter what he say's you are not phased by any of it. You could go there and show him that you are and forever more will be the better person. Come on B, what do you say?"

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Don't ask, just know that Alice did a damn good job in dressing me and I looked damn good tonight. If Edward Culling doesn't drool, James sure in hell will and so is every guy, except Jasper of course, in that restaurant.

Alice dressed me in a deep dark forest green dress that falls to mid-thigh. The dress hugs my backside, my hips and my thighs. The top half is loose along the back, the back neckline scooping in and making a u-shape. The front of the dress hugs my chest, but opens in a v-shape that shows off an appropriate amount of cleavage; my earrings black, long and daggling, matching my open toe heels. I looked great and I felt even better.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"Wow babe, you look stunning." James complimented as Alice, Jasper and I stepped out of Alice's Yellow Porsche.

"Thank you." I whispered, blushing as I accepted his praise.

"Are you guys ready for this?" James asked, looking only at me. "Edward and Tanya are waiting inside for us." he revealed, squeezing my hand as he said it.

With a deep breath, and every once of my courage I squeezed James hand back, and gave him a warm smile. "I'm very ready." I assured him, my words followed by a light kiss to his lips. He smiled, twining our fingers and pulling me gently behind Jasper and Alice.

The restaurant it self was beautiful, very intimate and classy. Alice, who was dressed in an all black number, was right on with our clothing. We fit right into the ambiance of our surroundings almost flawlessly.

Alice prattled off our party's name and the host, who was straightforwardly eye fucking both Alice and myself, showed us to our table that was in fact occupied by Edward-fuck bag-Cullen and his fiancée, Tanya Denali.

They stood as we neared the table, greeting us politely. To show him that his little tactics didn't bring me down, I acted maturely towards him and his fiancée, greeting both of them with polite smiles, and small kisses on the cheek. I think the kisses were a little too much, and so did Alice, who very subtly shook her head at me. I nibbled my lip in apology.

All the guys held out their respective girls chair before taking a seat themselves. The first few minutes were awkward, no one knowing what to say, but Alice quickly broke that what a few compliments to Tanya on her red dress. Then both girls got into wedding talk, a conversation that held no interest to me.

I turned to start a conversation with James, but he was preoccupied with talking sports with Jasper, a conversation that semi held my interest, but sports were the last thing on my mind. The only other person who was available was Edward and I straight out refuse to speak to him. I stood, all three guys following my lead. I looked at them all confusingly, until James spoke up. "Where are you going love?" My eyes enlarged at the endearment, the word taking not only me, but it seemed like Edward was right along with me, by surprise.

"Um…" I stammered looking around the table. Alice was smiling and Jasper looked contemplative as he looked between James, Edward and me. Tanya just looked indifferent. "I need the powder room. Excuse me." I stammered out before I practically sprinted from the table.

What was he thinking? Does he really feel that way about me, or is it just something that fit the environment? Can this night get anymore out of hand? I can't believe I agreed to this, never again; _never_ again.

After minutes of pacing I finally freshened myself up. I washed my hands while giving myself a pep talk and walked out of the bathroom door with a new kind of determination. I was determined to get out of here and go home. But what I wasn't expecting was to run into Edward as I walked out of the bathroom. But I should have, because I am very unlucky.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you there. Oh, Bella, it's just you."

"Yeah, just me. Plain old Isabella."

"I didn't mean it like-"

"Whatever, Edward." I tried to walk away but I was quickly turned back by my wrist. "What are you doing Edward?" I demanded.

"Look, I'm sorry-"

"Don't, because I don't want or need your apologies. You made yourself perfectly clear where I stand to you."

"_No_, god Isabella just _no_. Would you just listen for once? You don't understand anything that's going on. What kind of pressure I'm under."

"Pressure, Edward? Is this really about you being under pressure? Because from where I'm standing it's about you walking over the people who, after so long and with no substantiation to believe in you, thought you were still, a decent human being."

"You don't know Bella." He stated angrily. "If you would just-"

"I don't know? You know what I _don't_ know, Edward?" I sniffed, shaking my head. "I don't know why I came here. I don't know why I held you so close to my heart all these years knowing that in the end my heart would be broken.

"God Edward, you don't even know how hard it's been for me from the moment I saw you with her. How hard trying to be your friend has actually hurt me. And then for you to do what you did, for you to treat me like crap for no reason at all. What happened to you Edward? What happened to the boy that promised me the world? What happened to the boy who would get so defensive if you quoted his favorite movie wrong? What happened-"

I was quickly cut off by the most intense pair of lips I'd ever felt in my entire life. And I knew they belonged to him, no one else could or would ever compare to his strong full lips. They were always firm and smooth at the same time, and I'd know them from anywhere, but that wasn't how I knew it was him. It was the electricity that ran from his lips to mine that gave him away. If my eyes weren't open then that spark between us would have certainly given him away.

"He's still here." He whispered as his forehead found mine. "He's still here Bella. He just had to grow up is all. I wish I could tell you everything, but I can't. I just can't."

"God, we've been around each other for what, a month and a few weeks? And look at us, our lives are so complicated already. I think…I think it's really time to put the past in the past Edward. I think one of us should leave. Yeah, I think _I_ should be the one to leave."

I grabbed his hands, from my neck, bringing them down to his sides and walked away from him. I think this is going to be my best idea yet, I think I should leave.


	6. A New Path

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Six**_

_**Isabella**_

I'd made up my mind a week ago at the restaurant. I'm going to leave Dartmouth over Christmas break. That gives me two in-a-half months to get my classes in order and leave the past in the past. It's time to start my life fresh; it's time to live my life for me.

When I walked away from Edward I walked directly out of the restaurant, leaving everything and one behind. That's were the idea truly hit me. If I could just walk away like that tonight why can't I just do that on a bigger scale? Why can't I do that to better my life?

There are five parts to my plan; first I'm going to apply to Harvard again. Hopefully they'll accept me a second time, if not I have Washington State standing by.

Secondly, I have to get recommendations from a few of my teachers, the ones who see the potential and hard working skills I encompass.

Thirdly, I have to tell Alice, which isn't going to be easy. She came to this school because of me and I'm basically leaving her high and dry. But something told me she wouldn't be too disappointed with Jasper around.

Fourthly, I have to keep this under the radar until I actually leave. I don't want anyone stopping me. I don't want anyone to influence my decision. I have to do this for myself. I have to grow up and stop believing in fairytales.

And fifthly, I have to see my parents.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

_**A Month Later**_

The mail arrived early today. Alice has it in her hand. I'm nervous. I still haven't told her about my decision and today's the day I know my Harvard letter is arriving. She's going to freak.

"Bells you have mail…What the hell Isabella!" she screamed, rounding the corner from the door into the living room. "When were you going to tell me?"

"Soon."

"Soon? Why didn't you tell me when you applied Bella? What were you thinking, that you could just move out without me noticing the boxes?"

"Alice-"

"Don't you Alice me." She said forcefully. "Coming here was your idea, Bella. I came here, paid all of that money because you just had to, now you're going to just leave me here, and you weren't even going to tell me you were leaving? How selfish can you be?"

"Alice just listen okay." She glared at me, her little fist balled. "I thought that you would want to stay here anyway, to be with Jasper. You've created such a good life here for yourself Al. I could never even think about taking you away from it. _That_ would be selfish of me.

"You can do things here; I can't, not when I have to see him with her. Not when I have to see him period. I have to get away from here, because I'm losing myself, and my life has become this bad rerun of the 'Real World.' Now you can hate me, but I'm still leaving Al. Either Harvard or State, but I'm going."

"Then…then you'll just have to make room for me too."

"Alice." I murmured exasperatedly. "You don't have to-"

"Bella," she interrupted. "we came here together. We sacrificed everything for each other; you're my best friend in the entire world. No, scratch that, you're my sister and family sticks together no matter what. So you open this letter and tell me if we're going to Harvard."

"What about Jasper?" I bargained, knowing Alice was really hitting it off with him.

"He'll understand and I think that what we've built is strong enough to withhold long distance. Stop procrastinating and open the damn envelope Bella."

"Fine." I took the envelope from her, my hands shaking a little. I opened it up and scanned it quickly. "Oh my god Al…I didn't get in."

"What? Give me that." She snatched the paper from me and began reading. "Dear. Ms. Swan, We are sorry to inform you that due to your timing and…." I tuned her out, my thoughts flying a mile a minute. "Oh Bells, I'm sorry. But you got into state, right?" I nodded, whispering a 'yes.' "Okay than, all hope isn't lost. I'll apply now and… when were you planning on leaving?"

"Christmas break. There's something I have to do then. I thought I could do it while I was on my way out."

"We can still do it then I guess. Yes, Christmas would be perfect, because we were invited to spend thanksgiving with Jasper, but I guess we'll be packing up around that time."

"No, I've been packing for a while. I just have a few more things lying around the apartment and my bed set."

"Well, I guess I better catch up. So Jasper's for thanksgiving?"

"Um actually, I think you should do that alone. It's the perfect time to meet his family and I think you should do that. And before you worry about me, I want you to know I'll be just fine. I'll make a small turkey for myself and have a nice meal in front of the fire place."

"Bella, that's no fun."

"Alice, I just need time to myself, and this is the perfect holiday to take that time." She sighed, turning to leave. I hesitated, wanting to ask her something. "Um Alice, can I ask you for a favor?"

"Sure B, what is it?"

"Can you maybe ask Jasper to find out where Edward and Tanya will be spending their Christmas?"

"Oh, I know that. Thanksgiving at Edwards parents house, then Christmas at Tanya's parents place, why?"

"You'll find out for Christmas, later Ally."

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"So,"

"So?" I asked slowly as I turned around from his computer to face him. James had been stuttering over his words for the better part of thirty minutes and I was getting very irritated. I was supposed to end things with him, but there never seemed to be a good time.

"Would you like…I mean I was just wondering if you…"

"James, please spit it out."

"Would you like to come home with me for thanksgiving?"

"Oh," I was not expecting that. I mean I know we've been sort of dating for the past few months, but I didn't think we were anywhere near meeting the parents.

"Oh?" he asked hesitantly. "I know it's pretty early in our relationship, Bella, but-"

"James please stop…um, I-I can't. Oh god, look, you are a great guy, but I can't…I can't do this anymore. I think- I think we should end this, I don't want to lead you on, and if I stay with you longer then this than I will be leading you on. And you deserve better than that."

"So that's it? You're just ending it. Why? Is it _Cullen_?" he sneered.

"Um, actually no, it's me. I'm-I'm actually at fault here. I just don't think I can do this anymore."

"You don't _think_?" he asked angrily. I'd never seen him angry before and it was truly a site. He was even more beautiful this way. "That's real bullshit Bella. You do realize I invested in this relationship, time, effort, my-my heart and you don't _think_ you can do this anymore? Leave," he demanded abruptly.

"James?"

"Isabella, please leave before I do something I'll really regret. Leave."

I nodded my head, gathered my things and headed for the door. He was right behind me. I opened his door and stepped into the hallway. "James I'm really-"

He slammed the door in my face before I could get the entire sentence out. The force of the slam making a 'boom' that ricocheted through the frat house. A few of his 'brothers' poked their heads out of the door, looking around.

"What the fuck is going on?" Emmett asked as he rushed down the hall.

"Nothing, Em, just me leaving."

"What's going on Izzy; that boy of yours being a little shit? You want me to beat his ass for you?"

"It's not him Em, it's all me this time. Um, I have to go; I'll see you around Emmett."

"Yeah, see you around B."

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Thanksgiving came, and like I promised Alice, I made myself a small turkey and some mash potatoes along with some asparagus and sat in front of the fireplace to enjoy it.

I think about life after this day, opting to just enjoy the silence of the moment. But when dinner was done being eaten and leftovers were up, my thoughts drifted to the matters outside of these four walls.

I realized I'd probably never see some of the good people I've met here again; Rose and Emmett. I wish they get together soon. Jasper, well I have no doubt that I'll be seeing Jasper again. James…. You know what sucks, I actually started to like James and throw myself partially into the relationship with him, thinking by giving myself to someone else that I could wash Edward Cullen from my mind, but no. I could never wash him away when he's so close to me. After five years of remembering his love, of loving him and months of trying to be his friend, I think I care more about him now than I did all those years ago.

And throwing myself partially in a relationship with James was wrong. It may have seemed like it didn't hurt me to break up with him, but it did. Because somewhere along the way I'd really started to care about James, not knowing that I had actually let him into what was left of my heart. So I guess his invitation to thanksgiving wasn't too early, I was just too afraid.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"So, how was your vacation?" I asked Angela as she and I left the bio-lab.

"It was fantastic, and guess what?"

"What? Angela you can't hold out on me, what happened?" I exclaimed amusingly. She was glowing with joy, her eyes sparkling.

"I found out that someone I really like lives in my neighborhood and…well, we sort of ran into each other and got to talking, he asked me out."

"Ang, that's great news. So who is he?"

"Ben Cheney." She smiled, staring at me expectantly. I shook my head, not recalling the name. "He's in our Bio class, Bella."

"I have no idea who you're talking about?"

She sighed exasperated. "That's okay, because he asked me to ask you if we would like to join him and his lab partner at his house so we can all get started on our lab. I guess this is your last lab, huh?"

"Sorry babe." I had to tell Angela about my move. I'd grown to love the girl over the last few months and she was really a great friend. Besides, I was practically leaving her to fly solo in lab, which I felt horrible about. "But to make up for it I want you to tell Ben yes. I think meeting with him and his partner is a great idea. Four heads is way better than two. When are we meeting up?"

"Is tomorrow good for you? He said Wednesday's are the only days he really has his apartment to himself. His roommates go out to the local bar and don't come home until late."

"Sure, that's great, do you want to carpool?"

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Ben lives in a very nice apartment. His building even included an elevator. There are twenty floors to his building and he lives on the sixteenth floor, apartment 12L. Angela was hopping in place as we reached his front door. I was about to ask her to calm down, but the door swung open before I could contain her.

"Oh," a tall, geeky boy with glasses and pimples that circled his cheeks said as he walked out into the hall. "Hello ladies, I'm Eric."

"I'm Angela," Angela greeted, taking Eric out stretched hand.

"And you are?" he asked, releasing Angela's hand and reaching his out to me.

"Bella, it's nice to meet you Eric. Is Ben inside?"

"Oh, you're here to see Ben. Um, yeah he's in there with that other guy, maybe I'll catch you on my way back Bella, Angela." He smiled seductively, and it was…well amusing.

"Yeah, maybe." He walked away satisfied with my response and Angela and I stepped into the apartment, leaning against each other for support and as horrible as it is, we laughed. She shook with laughter and so did I.

"Angela?" called someone who I assumed to be the infamous Ben.

We straightened up, smoothing over our clothes before taking a few more steps into the apartment. Ben was in the living room, sitting around his living room table, with supplies and books thrown about the table.

"You came," Ben stated as he smiled up at Angela. I looked over at her to see her cheeks a few shades darker with blush.

"I said I was. And look, I even brought Bella. Where's your lab partner?"

"He's in the restroom. It's nice to finally meet you Bella."

"You too Ben, Angela talks about you all the time." He looked at me, his smile growing, his cheeks now flushed. They were so in it for the long hall.

"Oh, please have a seat; the sofas somewhere under here. So, do you guys know what part of the body you want to do?"

"I was thinking, maybe since you told me that you guys were doing the left side of the brain, we could do the right." Angela said quickly, looking at me for approval. I nodded, telling her to keep going. "Or, we could do the female uterus system."

"The right side of the brain sounds great, so does the uterus system. Those are both good ideas Angela." Ben complimented.

"Thank you." She whispered, showing her gratitude.

Seconds later, when conversation came to a standstill, there was a toilet flush and the sound of running water before the restroom door opened and Edward-freaking-Cullen walked into the living room.

"All right Ben, I'm all ready to get to- Isabella?" he whispered. "What are you…" he cleared his throat, his words coming out stronger. "What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Ben's my partner."

"Angela's mine."

"You know each other?" Ben and Angela asked in unison. They looked at each other, both blushing.

"Um, yeah, I guess we do." I whispered.


	7. This Conversation Doesn't Change a Thing

**_PLEASE READ!_**

_So, I have a huge favor to ask of you guys. In return, I've provided you guys with an early chapter. Okay, so outside of this fanfiction world I have decided to give writing a real shot. Only I'm stuck on this sort of fight scene between father and daughter. My character Vivian, isn't saying what I want her to say. But the words did come from my brain so I'm kind of lost on that setting. Anyway, she's saying things to her father that sounds fake to me and I wrote them! Sorry, let me continue. I just need feedback. Can you guys maybe tell me if what she's saying in this little section is sounding like something you guys would say to your father. It would be much appreciated if you could maybe leave a comment on the blog about it. Thank you. The website address is below. Type the address into GOOGLE. It should be the only web page that shows up. The name of the blogs topic is **WORDS**. I just created it and I'm still working on learning how to use it and make it nicer for viewing. Any who I hope you enjoy this chapter of **Blurry Lines**._

_**writingsofawomanonherown(dot)blogspot(dot)com**_

* * *

><p><em><strong>Blurry Lines: Chapter Seven<strong>_

_**Edward**_

"Um, yeah, I guess we do." She whispered. 'I _guess_ we do?' What is that supposed to mean? Of course we know each other. I haven't seen or heard anything about Isabella in a month, keeping my promise to Tanya and staying away from her, but that doesn't mean I don't know her. How could she sound so unsure of that?

Agreeing to that promise was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my entire life. But Tanya was right, she's the women I love _now_, she's the women that I should worry about. Her wants; needs and safety should come before all others, even Isabella's.

After agreeing to Tanya's terms I avoided Isabella like the plague. Skipping lunch with my friends, staying at my apartment instead of my room at the frat house, knowing she would be there with _him_. In Bio class, I made sure I entered the class after her and left before her.

She caught me the first day I started avoiding her, confronting me, calling me out for being a prick. She was wrong about everything, of course, but she wouldn't let me get a word in to explain why I was doing what I was doing. I knew my words were just that, words, but I needed her to know, to understand. She walked away, though, leaving me behind.

She stayed away from me after that, ignoring me and taunting me with her skin tight clothing. And that bastard James loved every goddamn minute of it; smiling like the fucking cat that ate the goddamn canary. I wanted to deck him.

And finally, when I thought that I would lose my goddamn mind if I saw her one more time and wasn't able to talk to her or touch her, Alice fucking Brandon came up with a fucking group dinner. I agreed immediately, jumping in before Tanya could decline. I got shit for it when I drove her to her place, but I took her shit happily. I was just excited to see _Bella_.

And boy did I see her. When she walked into the restaurant that night I was stunned silent. She looked so fucking hot in that green number. I wanted to swoop her up and lay her out right there on the table we sat at. And that little visual scared the hell out of me, not ever having or feeling anything like that before.

When everyone at the table got to talking, Alice distracting Tanya with wedding talk and when that ass hat James started talking to Jasper I just knew I would get to talk to Bella, but she had other plans as she stood, making every male at the table follow suite.

She was confused as to why we stood, but ass hat James asked her where she was heading, letting her know without words that your supposed to announce where your going as you stand. But that wasn't why her eyes widen in surprise, or why Alice eyes budged, or mine narrowed. That ass hat called her 'love'. After she heard that she nearly bolted for the ladies room.

We all sat at the table for a long time, waiting for her to return. I was just sitting there, not paying attention to anyone's conversation, when ass hat James pulled me into his. "So, what are you guys doing for thanksgiving Edward?"

"Oh, um, I think we're going to my parents."

"We are," Tanya confirmed as she grabbed my hand. "and were going to my parents house for Christmas. Daddy's thinking about taking us to the islands."

"What about you Alice, Jasper?" I asked, getting the attention away from us.

"Well, I asked this pretty little lady if she would come home with me for thanksgiving and she said yes. I also asked her to invite Bella," she said looking over at James. "that's if you-"

"No, that was cool, but I'm going to ask her to my house; my little sisters all up for meeting her. Even my mom is digging out her best. I just hope she say's yes."

"Well of course she'll say yes," Tanya said, butting in. "where else is she going to go?" Tanya asked sardonically.

"Tanya." I warned.

"What, didn't she say she didn't have any parents?"

"She has parents." I told her forcefully. She narrowed her eyes at me, watching me intensely.

"Your parents don't count, Edward." She retorted, curving her left eye brow, daring me to disagree.

I just couldn't help disappointing her. "They're-"

"You're a bitch." Alice exclaimed, cutting me off and glaring at Tanya.

"Excuse me?" Tanya asked appalled.

"There's no excuse for you."

"Alice." Jasper whispered, trying to calm the small little thing.

"No Jazz, this needs to be said, and if Edward won't do it, I sure as hell will. What has Bella every done to you for you to treat her with so little respect? She's never once said a bad word about you, even after she found out about the two of you, she let it go, accepting that things just don't turn out how you plan them, but you have the ability to make new plans and choices. That girl deserves to be treated with respect and I be damned if I sit here and let you talk about my best friend that way, my sister. So if you don't have anything nice to say then just keep your trap shut. And yes, she does have parents. She has my mom and dad, and as much as you try to snub it, the Cullens are her parents. And if that doesn't float your boat, her mother and step dad is around somewhere."

I smiled at Alice, James clapping for her, Jasper kissing her sweetly. She was small, but boy was she packed with energy. The look of shock on Tanya's face made me want to laugh and I was having a difficult time holding it in. I excused myself quickly, and walked away from the table. I didn't even reach the hall before my body shook with laughter.

I walked around the corner, instantly colliding with someone who I straight away knew was Isabella from the shock that surged through my body and the skin tight green dress. Something came out of my mouth that she took the wrong way. When I tried to tell her I didn't mean it like that she went off on another one of her little rants. I tried once more to explain to her, but knowing I couldn't tell her the entire situation, I couldn't break Tanya's trust in me. But then again, I couldn't lose _my_ Isabella completely.

So I kissed her; cutting her off mid rant with my lips. It was the single most electrifying thing I have ever experienced in my entire life. Her lips fit mine so perfectly that I couldn't help but melt into her. She was so warm, soft. I wanted to wrap my arms around her, but I couldn't, knowing that this kiss was way out of line as it was.

I broke the kiss, leaning my head against hers. I told her something about me always being myself, how I was still here and not lost. She told me something about how we've only been near each other for a short while and we were messing up each others lives more then need be, then she said that one of us should leave, she opted to be the one, not giving me a choice, and then she walked away.

This is the first time in almost two months that I've really seen her, and she 'guess,' she knows me. Well I guess I deserve that. "How have you been Bella?"

"Fine, and you?"

"Good, I've been good."

"That's great, and Tanya?" she asked politely.

"She's good too." I answered honestly. I looked at her for a moment, taking her beautiful features in, than I turned to Ben who was just in the middle of clearing his throat. "I'm sorry, um, you must be Angela?" I greeted reaching out to shake her hand.

"Yes, so how do you Know Bella? I didn't think she knew anyone from our class."

"We have common friends, and we knew each other as teenagers."

"Cool, so are you guys ready to work?"

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Bella, who I found out just now, came to Dartmouth for the pre-med program just like me, and Angela who's in the same program decided to go with the right side of the brain for their project, which turned out to be a great idea, because Ben and I needed information on it and they needed information on the left side of the brain.

Together and over four hours later we were packed to the rim in fake brain matter and little tube diagrams. Both projects were coming alone beautifully so around midnight when Angela's head was luxuriously prompted on Bens shoulder, we decided to call it a night.

"Maybe it would be better for her to just stay here. Is that okay with you Ben?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, sure, I'll put her in my bed and I'll take the couch. How are you going to get home, didn't Ang drive?"

"Um, I'll just w-"

"No," I interrupted before she could offer up that ridiculous concept. "I'll drive you."

"Edward, that's fine, I can walk."

"Isabella, it's really late outside and you live over what, twenty-two blocks away? I'll take you, it's not a problem. Come on, my cars in the garage. Goodnight Ben, and please make sure the projects stay intact."

"I will. Goodnight you two. It was really a pleasure to meet you Bella."

"You too Ben, and thank you for having us, oh, and thank you for looking after Angela; tell her to call me tomorrow okay?" she asked.

"Will do, night guys." He said once more as he shut the door behind us.

"So, are you ready to head out?"

"Yeah, sure."

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Do you know that moment, when two people are talking, not because they want to but because they're confined to a small space and it's polite to make conversation, even if it's just two or three sentences each; how when they run out of things to talk about there's this awkward silence that lingers and no one knows what to say anymore, or what to do so they sit in the silence and hope that the time pass quickly.

Well that was Isabella and myself at the moment. I was the stupid person that tried vainly to make conversation and she was the person vainly hopping I would drive faster. I refused, taking as much time as I could. I wanted to savor this, because something in me, I don't know what, intuition? Whatever it was, it told me I wasn't going to get this again, _this_ was it.

"So how are things going with James?" She looked at me, her teeth finding their way into her bottom lip. She looked contemplative. "What, did you break up with him or something?"

She looked away from me, nodding her head minutely. "Yes, before thanksgiving."

"If you don't mind me asking, why, I thought you two were getting alone fairly well?"

"We were,"

"So then why-"

"Edward, please don't ask questions you don't really want answers to."

"If I didn't want the answer then I wouldn't have asked the question Isabella." I stated mater-of-factly.

"Fine, Edward, since you want to know so badly. I broke it off with James because I just couldn't do it anymore. He was nice, charming, good-looking, everything a girl could want right? But he wasn't for me. There was nothing there for me, and it would have been wrong of me to lead him on more than I already had. I did try with him, Edward, I really did, but there was just nothing, no spark, no flam, no anything.

"And you want to know why? Because he never even came close to making me feel how _you_ make me feel." My eyes shot to her, shock coursing through my body. I couldn't even think much less drive. I hurriedly pulled my car over to the side of the road, my breath leaving me in a 'whoosh' sound.

What was she saying?

Nine minutes later, my mind began to work again. I looked at her as she looked at me, our eyes meeting. She couldn't say things like that. I'm engaged, I'm getting married, I'm with Tanya.

"Isabella-"

"I told you not to ask questions you didn't want answers to, Edward."

"I didn't expect that as an answer. You can't say things like that, Bella. What am I supposed to do when you say things like that?"

"I don't expect you to do anything Edward. You wanted an answer and you got it. For some reason my mind, and my heart as well, won't let you go. And you don't know how painful that is. You don't know how much it hurts to want to throw yourself fully into a healthy relationship with someone just to find out that that person is actually falling in love with you, and you can't even return the feelings. But it's just like I said, James was perfect, but he wasn't you."

"Bella, I'm-I'm engaged."

"God, you think I don't know that? Were you listening to me at all?"

"I love Tanya." I continued to ramble.

"Edward please, just take me home."

"I gave her my word Bella, I gave her a ring, I can't go back on that."

"You gave _me_ your word once, Edward, and you went back on it."

I looked at her a moment longer before starting the car again and driving her home. She was absolutely right. I gave her my word, I promised her and I went back on it.

What's the difference between her and Tanya? Why am I able to keep my word to Tanya, but wasn't able to keep it to her? At one point in my life I loved the girl sitting next to me with everything I had. I wouldn't have missed a beat to do anything for her. So why can't I do that now?

We finally arrived in front of Bella's apartment building, the sidewalk lighted with lamps. I turned the car off, and waited for her to move, or say something. When she just sat there in thought, I couldn't muster up the courage to distract her.

"Have a Marry Christmas Edward." She finally said, moving to exit the car.

"Isabella, Christmas isn't for weeks."

"Do you plan on seeing me before or after that Edward? Nothing has changed, this conversation, it doesn't change a thing. We'll go on as we have been, you ignore me and I'll ignore you. Eventually I'll move on. I have to, because you have and when it comes down to it, we're not those same fourteen year old kids. You're a grown man who made a promise to a woman that you should keep, and I'm a grown woman who needs to grow up and move on. So have a Marry Christmas, Edward."

She got out, leaving me stunned into silence. I guess it's true what they say, don't ask questions you don't want answers to.


	8. Out With the Old, In With the New

**_Blurry Lines: Chapter Eight_**

**_Edward_**

Christmas was approaching fast, and I was at a lost on what to get Tanya. I knew exactly three things the gift couldn't be; cheep, fake, or plastic, which kinds of fall under the fake category. Those were the only classifications on Tanya's wish list. If it were up to me her gift would be simple, intimate, and something personal, but she didn't like those things. She likes flashy, things that are eye-catching. A 16karat diamond is more what she's asking for.

Why can't she be simple? Why can't she like greeting cards with old tunes, or funny pictures? Why can't an antique make her smile? Why can't a photo of us make her shed tears? Why can't she have simple taste, but make it seem like the most expensive thing in the world to her? Why can't she be Isabella?

No, stop.

I rebuked myself. Ever since Isabella displayed her heart for me, I've just been completely lost. She's the only thing on my mind night or day and it's scaring me. Five years of thinking she gave up on us to find out _she_ _didn't_, but _I_ had…. I've been so lost; comparing Tanya's every move, word, anything to what I've seen in Bella. And when I put them next to each other like that I feel sick knowing that Bella always comes out on top.

I feel sick because I know what I should do, what I was supposed to do, but I can't. Something inside of me is still that fourteen-year-old boy that knows if I get close to her again someone is going to come and take her away from me. And I won't survive it, not again. So I'm staying with Tanya, because I do love her, and she's who I promised myself to now. She's my fiancée, she deserves her happiness.

**_-~~'\\%/'~~-_**

"Are you ready babe?" Tanya asked as I packed the last of the things from my room at the frat house.

"Yeah, just let me run to Jaspers room. He has my iPod."

"Sure, hurry back." She said as she kissed my neck.

I walked out of the room, my feet bringing me down the hall and around the corner to Jaspers room that was tucked away in the left corner as soon as you turned. As I neared I heard Jasper talking, the person in the room talking back to him sounding like James.

"So she's gone, where?" James asked begging for knowledge.

"Her and Alice packed up and headed north-west." I didn't hear anymore, I just opened the door, letting myself in.

"Isabella's gone?" I asked dejectedly, my heart squeezing a bit.

Jasper sighed, sitting on the edge of his bed. "Close the door Edward."

I closed the door and walked further into the room. I felt rather then saw James's glare into my back as I crossed the room to Jaspers computer chair. I just sighed miserably and took a seat.

"What's going on Jasper? Where are they? Where is Isabella?"

"Why do you care Cullen? I bet she left because of you, you bastard." James snipped accusingly. I didn't pay him any attention, my focus solely on finding Bella

"Where are they Jasper?" I asked once more.

"Alice didn't tell me much. She just told me they had some business to attend to up north for Christmas and that they'd be picking one of the schools they applied to soon and going there to finish out their degree. They left yesterday after Bella's last class."

"So they're moving away?"

"Try again 'daddies boy,' they're _gone_ already. Their place is totally empty, all ready for moving in."

"Why didn't she tell me? She couldn't have been that selfish to just leave."

"Edward?" Jasper murmured. "Keep your voice down."

"No," I yelled standing up. "She can't just leave Jasper. I just got her back."

"Edward," Jasper tried again.

"Call Alice Jasper." I demanded.

"Why?"

"I want to talk to Isabella. Please call her Jasper, please." I begged.

"And what makes you think she wants to talk to _you_?" James asked, standing from his seat as well. "She left because of you."

"You don't know a thing, so just back off."

"_I_ don't know a thing? The girl _I_ love just walked out of my life forever because of you Cullen and _I_ don't know a thing? I should beat your ass Cullen."

"See, you _don't_ know a _thing_." I mocked my voice poisonous. "The girl _you_ love just left because _she's_ in love with _me, Hunters_. Yeah, did you really think she loved you? She may have had feelings for you, but she left you because _you_ couldn't _compare_ to _me_. Isabella and I could _never_ love anyone like we love each other, so the possibility of her ever loving you is very, _very_ slim."

"Bastard!" He roared, coming at me with a cocked fist. I side stepped him and Jasper grabbed him by the shirt, slinging him on the bed. The door opened, and in came Emmett and a very pissed looking Tanya.

"What the hells going on?" Emmett demanded.

"Nothing." I said fast, my eyes glued to Tanya.

"Well it didn't sound like nothing." he said, crossing his arms. "In fact everyone out there heard _every_ word you two said, and Edward," He called looking at Tanya then me. "boy are you fucked."

"_You're room, now_!" Tanya demanded. I nodded, following her as she walked out. God help me.

**_-~~'\\%/'~~-_**

"What were you thinking; getting into a fight over another woman, Edward? Do you even care about what I say, or ask of you Edward? One simple favor, stay away from Isabella Swan and you can't even do that for me."

"That's-"

"No, I heard you. I heard every word Edward. Tell me this, if you and she could never love anyone like you love each other, then why are you with me? If she loves you better than I could than why aren't you with her?"

There was nothing I could say. I love Tanya, god I love her, but she just, she's not the _one_, and I know that now. It took Isabella leaving me, _again_, to know for sure.

"I'll tell you what Edward, when you can answer that question you join me at my parents house for Christmas. Until then I hope you have a nice trip back to your parents place."

She collected her things and left quickly, her sniffles still hearable from here. As soon as I was sure she was gone, I ran out of my room, back to Jaspers. I needed to find _my_ girl, _now_.

**_-~~'\\%/'~~-_**

"Hello?" Alice's spunky voice answered.

"Alice?" I called. "Alice this is Edward, where is she, where's Isabella?"

"Oh, Edward, um, look Edward I'm really sorry, but she doesn't want to talk to you, I'm so sorry, but I have to go. Tell Jazz-"

"No Alice just listen to me, please."

"I can't Edward. I'm sorry, but she wants nothing to do with you. I have to go, bye." The phone went dead, and so did my heart. She wants nothing to do with me? Fuck that, she doesn't get a choice.

"Where are you going Edward?" Jasper yelled down the hall at me as I ran from his room.

"I need to talk to my dad. I'm going home."

I finished my packing in a rush, things disorganized. I just didn't give a damn, I needed to get home, I needed help.

"Hey, I took the liberty of changing your flight information, and adding another ticket or three." Jasper informed me as he stepped into my room.

"What do you mean three?"

"Um, well I was suppose to spend Christmas with Emmett and Rose since he finally got her to agree to meet his parents, and mine are gong to Hawaii. But if you're going on a mission to get your girl, then I'm coming with, and when Rose and Emmett found out, well lets just say we're all in."

"Thanks man." I said graciously "Thanks a lot."

"Hey, we still have to find them, then we have to convince B. that you aren't a total ass. Lets go Ed. The plane boards in less then an hour, and it's almost rush time."

"Where's Rosalie and Em?" I asked as we rushed out of the room.

"We're right here Eddie." Emmett called from the front door of the frat house. "Now let's go, we have a plane to catch."

**_-~~'\\%/'~~-_**

By the time we reached the airport we were cutting it close. We had to make it to gate ten in less then twelve minutes. Gate ten was at the end of the terminal so we had to run. Have you ever ran a race with leg weights? No, good, me neither. I have something heavier though, suitcases, two of them and a carry on. And the others weren't in any better of a shape. Jasper dropped his bags, twice. Emmett, big broad Emmett fell and Rose, well she's Rose, she mostly speed walked complaining about sweating.

So only god knows how we made it with exactly two minutes on the clock. We boarded the plane and took our seats immediately; all four of us out of breath, panting for air. I sure as hell am one lucky son of a bitch.

**_-~~'\\%/'~~-_**

My father agreed to pick us up from Seattle airport, saving us money and time on a rental car. I was forever grateful and it also gave me time to bring up Bella without my mother around.

Unfortunately, I didn't get to bring up Bella as I'd hoped. My father had an important phone meeting that he couldn't reschedule. So the car ride was spent listing to my father argue with the board of the hospital about new equipment needed for the emergency room.

An hour later we were turning the familiar curves to my parents' house in the woods, my father still on his phone; Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie, listening to their iPods in the back seat. I was about to inform them that we'd arrived when my father said something about a U-haul. He ended his call, pulling on side of the big truck in the driveway.

"What's going on dad, are you guys moving or something?" He smiled, shaking his head.

"Not that I know of; maybe your mother brought new furniture without telling me and was trying to dispose of the evidence before I got back." I laughed nodding my head.

"That sounds like mom."

We walked up to the house, my father going in first. "Es, you want to tell me why we have a- My god." My father said, stopping in the door way.

"Hi dad, how you been?"

The moment I heard her voice I froze, my bags falling out of my hands and hitting the floor, or so I thought. "Shit Edward, that hurt!" Emmett exclaimed from beside me.

"Isabella?" My father whispered.


	9. I Don't Owe You Anything

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Nine**_

_**Isabella**_

Alice and I left a day before everyone else was supposed to. With the exception of Rosalie, Angela and Jasper we didn't tell anyone goodbye, it was pointless. We would never see these people again, and I didn't care to see most of them now, so we left, heading north-west towards some old friends of mine.

Alice was a real sport about the drive, playing music and games with me. We were a good day and a half into our drive when Alice's phone rung for the first time. She picked it up, her voice filled with amusement from seeing a drifter on side of the road pull down his pants for a ride. I never thought I'd see it, but there it was.

"Hello?" Alice asked excitedly, must be Jasper. There was a moment's pause before she looked at me, her face falling and her bottom lip going between her teeth.

"Oh, Edward," I shook my head, chanting the word 'no' to her. "um, look Edward I'm really sorry, but she doesn't want to talk to you, I'm so sorry, but I have to go. Tell Jazz-"

She was cut off, listening to him.

"I can't Edward." She said after a moment. "I'm sorry, but she wants nothing to do with you. I have to go, bye." She ended the phone call and unknowingly my heart. She was right; I want nothing to do with him. But where I'm going now, do I really get that choice?

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

Alice and I were about an hours drive from where we were going. Instead of driving all the way through we decided to take a break and check into a motel for the night. Alice was a little skeptical about staying at a 'motel,' but I was all for it; a warm bed, a nice bath, like I said, all for it. So we checked in a stayed the night; both of us taking turns showering and both of us sharing the single bed in the room.

Alice was an early riser, so she was up and about hours before I was out of bed, gathering our things and packing it all back up. She woke me officially around ten so we could have a late breakfast. When I turned breakfast down and told her we would get better food where we were going she was the first to nod her head.

When the car was all packed up we were on our way, driving the hour it took to our destination. When we finally entered the city limits of Forks Washington I was as nervous as I'd ever been in my entire life. I was starting to feel so unsure of myself, of this decision. What if they don't remember me? What if Edward was wrong about Esme, and Carlisle still considering me as their daughter? God, maybe I shouldn't….

"Bella, you'll be fine. I'll be there with you and you'll be fine." I nodded my head, thanking her silently for being here for me, for always being there for me. I vow from this day forwards to always be there for her.

"That was my dad's house." I whispered as I drove past the familiar white wooden house with the dark blue shutters. It looked almost exactly the same, but the white paint was beginning to chip and the shutters were falling off. "I don't think anyone lives in it."

"I don't think so either."

I passed my old childhood home with a promise to visit it before I left town. We drove down the main street, crossing over the river out of town and down the dirt path. The Cullen's loved their exclusivity so they loved living deep, deep into the woods. About half way down the dirt path I took a familiar right and drove further into the greenery that was the Cullen estate.

"Who would want to live all the way out here?" Alice asked as I drove further.

"Esme loves her peace, and Carlisle loves with Esme does. But don't worry, we're here." I assured her as I pulled in front of the familiar white house. It was just as I remembered it, big, perfect and white, but home. "Come on."

We got out of the car, my heart jumping, my fingers aching. I was so nervous to see them, to be here again. I know I was supposed to take this trip with someone else, but god, I'm glad I have Alice with me right now.

I walked up to the door, Alice knocking because my hands wouldn't move. We waited for what seemed like forever before the front door swung open and a beautiful Auburn haired woman stood in the door way. Her heart shaped face and beautiful light brown eyes giving her away.

"May I help you?" She asked, giving us the once over. She made eye contact with me and held it for the longest time, before looking away and shaking her head as if to clear it.

"Um yes," I spoke. "can you tell me if Dr. C's home?"

"Carlisle isn't here, but I'm expecting him home momentarily. Why don't you two come in." she offered, opening the door wider for us.

We walked in, Alice taking hold of my hand for support. "The living room is to the right, would any of you like something to drink?"

"Um no, no thank you." I answered.

Alice and I took a seat on the long couch, while Esme took a seat across from us in the love-seat. We sat in silence, no one knowing what to say. Esme continued to look at me, her eyes only going to Alice for a brief second before they came back to me.

"So how do you ladies know Carlisle?" Esme asked, curiously. "Are you patients of his?"

"Do you not remember me at all?" I murmured as Alice squeezed my hand tight.

She nodded her head,the motion slight, but noticeable. Her eyes welled. "I do," she said, holding my gaze. "but I want to be absolutely sure, before I make a complete idiot of myself. So if you'll just tell me-"

"It's _me_ mom, it's _me_." I assured her as I stood.

"Isabella." She cried as she stood, rushing over to me and engulfing me into a hug. "Oh Bella, I thought I'd never see you again."

"Me too mom…" we hugged each other, refusing to let go. Esme was in the middle of telling me how much she'd missed me and how much she loved me when the front door opened.

"Es, you want to tell me why we have a-" Esme and I broke apart at the sound of Carlisle's familiar voice entering the room. I turned around to face him, and my god, that man still looks the same as the day I left. "My god." He murmured, staring directly at me.

"Hi dad, how you been?" I asked, teary eyed.

The moment I spoke there was a bang, then a loud commotion behind Carlisle. "Shit Edward, that hurt!" Emmett exclaimed from somewhere in the distance. Once I heard Edwards name leave his mouth I gasped and stepped back, backing into the wall.

"Isabella?" Carlisle whispered moving towards me. He came over to me, his arms outstretched. "Bella." He whispered once more when he was close. I ran into his arms, and over his shoulder I saw Edward standing as still as a tree branch.

"Dad," I whispered in Carlisle's ear, his arms squeezing me tighter, my eyes on Edward.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

It was sometime later that we were all settled throughout the house in various rooms. I was having a large panic attack and adamantly refusing to talk to or see Edward. Around seven everyone was summoned to join Esme and Carlisle in the kitchen for dinner. Esme and her amazing-ness quickly provided us with a beautiful dinner during the short amount of time she had. And when everyone entered the kitchen they were surprised and excited to dig in, especially the boys.

After a brief prayer, everyone dug in, filling their plates with all sorts of good food, and treats. "So," Esme started as she passed the mash potatoes to Alice. "does anyone else think this is a wonderful, wonderful day. I never thought I'd have both my children under the same roof again. This has to be the best Christmas present I've ever gotten."

"Me as well Esme." Carlisle said before turning his attention to me. "Isabella, you've grown beautifully. How have you been? Were you treated fairly, did they take care of you as you should have been taken care of?" he asked truly curious.

"I've been fair, for the past few months. Um and as far as Renee and Phil are concerned, well we can talk about that later, privately."

"Of course," Carlisle responded, glancing once at Esme "Well tell us what you've been up to since you left them?"

"Um…" I said stalling for an answer.

"Yes, Isabella, tell us what you've been up to?" Edward asked, letting the warning linger in his voice.

"I've been going to school at Dartmouth, with Edward."

"What, so you two have been near each other all of this time?" Esme asked pleased. "Why didn't you tell us Edward? We could have come up to see you, both of you?"

"Isabella didn't want me to." He told her straight out, making me feel even worse for my earlier decisions.

"Isabella, why…?"

"Because I didn't know if…if you would remember me; if I still meant to you now what I did back then. I didn't want to say yes to Edward when he told me he would tell you guys I was here because I was scared that the outcome wouldn't have been what I wanted it to be."

"Oh Isabella, we will always love you as one of ours. You meant too much to us for us to ever disregard you in any way. You're our daughter. So what changed your mind, why did you decide to come?"

"Yeah, what changed your mind Isabella?" Edward asked demandingly.

"Edward," Esme warned. "You're being rude. I didn't raise you that way so stop it."

"I was actually headed some place new, me and Alice…I had to see you guys before I left though. I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I didn't at least try…If I didn't get to say goodbye properly."

"So they deserve a proper goodbye; yet you leave without telling me anything?" Edward yelled, standing from his seat, his food forgotten. "I had to hear you were gone from Jasper and that little prick James. Why didn't _you_ tell me!" He demanded of me.

"I don't owe you anything Edward!" I said just as heatedly, also standing, food also forgotten. "My decision was to leave, this time by choice, that's _my_ right. I didn't _owe_ _you a thing_. Why do you even care? All this time we've been avoiding each other and what, you find out that I left and now you chose to care? Well I don't want you to. I'm doing this for _me_, for _my_ sanity, and heart. I need to do this, and you can't be apart of it."

"You don't get it, my heart is as emotionally involved in this as yours is."

"So what, now that you've found your feelings for me I'm supposed to run into your arms? No, the world doesn't work like that, Edward. There are people, Tanya, Alice…they've given up so much and it would be selfish of me to even think about being with you."

"I'm asking you not to go Isabella. I'm _begging_ you. _I need you_. God, i need you so much. I've always needed you. I'm asking you _not_ to go Isabella. I'm _begging_ you" I shook my head, looking around the table at the slightly stunned faces. I'd forgotten about them that quickly.

"I… can't breathe." I turned, running for the back door. I exited and took the familiar path through the woods to a secret hideaway that only Edward and I knew of. A secret spot that always calmed me, and made me feel safe.

I reached the meadow in record time from the white house. I didn't know this when Edward first showed it to me but the meadow is right off the trail from Esme and Carlisle's house. We always took the highway, but one day we got lost and ended up right in our own back yard.

I entered the beautiful meadow, the wind blowing dully, the flowers not yet snow covered, but no longer living. I'd only seen this place like this six times when I lived at the white house, each time, like now, took my breath away.

I sat in the middle of the meadow, thinking and watching the sun fade into darkness. I felt horrible, and at the same time I knew it needed to be done. I didn't owe him anything. I left so he could keep his promise to Tanya, so he could finally let me go as I want to let him go, so he could have a good healthy life with the woman he loves now. Why did he have to follow me?

"I knew I would find you here." You have got to be kidding me! He walked into the meadow, walking pass me and looking out at the scenery.

"Why are you doing this Edward?" I asked remanding seated in the middle of the meadow, my legs coming up to my chin, my arms wrapping around them. "I leave and you follow me, why? You have Tanya now, you made _her_ a promise, and you gave _her_ the ring…."

"I though you would forget." He said as he came to stand in front of me. He sat down Indian style, and watched me as he talked. "I thought once you were out of this small, dead end town you would forget; about me, Esme, Carlisle, our plans, our life together. I thought you would put it in the back of your head and you would never revisit it again. But I held on to you for years. Girls asked me out and I would say 'no, I have a girlfriend named Isabella and she's the only one for me.' I told that to Tanya when she first asked me out, but she was persistent, she didn't want to give up. Tanya wanted me so badly and I never understood why. She was the first girl to put the seed of doubt into my head.

"I didn't care though. I continued to tell her no, but then her friends, and other girls that would ask me out would tell me the same thing that she would tell me; 'that girls probably forgotten all about you.' 'Are you sure she's the only one for you, she may have already found a new boyfriend.' 'You're wasting your time if you think she's coming back to _Forks_ for you.'"

"Why couldn't you just believe in what we planned, what we promised each other? I waited for you. Boy's asked me out too, but I turned them down. I told them I had a boyfriend that I loved. I had faith in you Edward, I had faith in _us_."

"And now?" he asked. "Do you have faith in me now, in _us_?"

"There is no _us_, Edward. There's a me, and there's a you and Tanya, but there is no _us_."

"What if there could be? What if there could be a you and me Isabella? What if we could be together?" he asked, determination in his eyes.

"We can't Edward, you're engaged to T-"

"I don't think I am anymore."

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"Tanya and I were at the frat house packing a few of my things to go to her parents for Christmas. Jasper had something for me and I went to get it, that's where I found out about you. He was in his room talking to James about you leaving, I overheard and barged in. I asked Jasper what was going on, but James kept getting in my face, blaming me for you leaving him. So I got in his face right back. I told him that you weren't in love with him, that you never where because you loved me and that I loved you and that we could never love anyone the way we love each other. Tanya overheard me and…

"She went to her parents, told me if I loved you more then her that I should just be with you. I left after that to find you, to stop you from leaving again. Isabella you can't go, I lost you once, I can't do it again." He reached out, his finger tips grazing along my cheek bone. I melted into his touch, my instincts over powering my thoughts. "I need you."

"I need you too." I tearfully assured him. "I've always needed you, Edward." I croaked. _But we can't-_ I mental ending was cut short.

He reached in, capturing my lips with his. We fell back into the grass, his body warm against mine. He kissed me fervidly, and I returned it. Edward Cullen was like an enigma to me. He always was, and I have a feeling he always will be.

He leaned up, looking into my eyes, searching, probing me for some unknown information, when he found what he was looking for he lifted his shirt, his bare chest glowing in the moonlight. He asked for silent permission to lift mine and I gave it to him completely. He leaned his body on mine and continued to kiss me.

I felt him everywhere; my fingers, my legs, my body. I was completely consumed by Edward Cullen. I was nervous though. I've never done this before, but I trusted him. He was who I belonged with, no one else. But he's engaged, if he still knows it or not, he's going to be with her, he's going to keep his word just this once. I'll give him this; I'll give him _me_ this one night. Give him something no one else in the world can have, but he's going to keep his word to her. If my heart has to break over and over, he's going to keep his word.

I left Edward asleep in the meadow, my clothes covering his body. I walked back to the white house, calling Alice on the way. I was finally ready.

"So, clothes?" she asked as she handed me a pair of pants and shirt in the back yard.

"Yeah, I covered Edward with my other shirt and pants. I don't want to talk about it. Do you have the pen, the paper?"

"Are you sure you want to do this? I mean he loves you Bella, Jasper told me Tanya was out of the picture if you said yes to him."

"I don't want to say yes to him. At one time in my life I belonged to Edward Cullen, but not now. Tanya does now, he gave her the ring and I'm not going to ruin her happiness. He would be marrying her and living happily ever after if I didn't come along again. He gave a woman a promise and a ring and he's going to follow through with it. For once in his privileged life he's going to follow his word. The paper please?"

She handed me the note book and I took it, walking over to the patio and taking a seat. Alice sat across from me, waiting for my next move. So I wrote.

_Dear Mom, Dad…_

_I'm sorry to leave so abruptly, but I have to. I want to thank you for welcoming me back with open arms. You were always parents to me, before and after my father was taken away from me. I always loved you two with all my heart, even through the bad times, the rough and deprived times, I saw your smiling faces and made it through. I wanted to say thank you for that._

_Thank you for loving me so much that it did in fact save my life; over and over again._

_Now I need you to save Edwards. Make him Marry Tanya. He promised her, he gave her his word. He may hate you for pushing him towards her, but you can't let him look for me. I don't want him to find me. I want to move on with my life, be happy, be with someone that makes me feel how Tanya makes him feel. He and I can never work out, what we had was in the past and that's where it should stay. Please, for me, make him see reason. And can you please tell him to go to her, she's expecting his call._

_I'll keep in touch, I promise. I don't think I can go that long without talking to either one of you again. I love you both._

_One more thing, give Edward the end of this note, I owe it to him…._

"Did you say goodbye to Jasper?"

"Yes, I told him I would call him when we got settled. Then he and I can make plans for our future."

"That's good Ally. Are you ready?"

"Are you?" she answered softly.

"As I'll ever be."

And I was, for the first time there was nothing left of me to give, and nothing more I wanted to receive. I was finally ready to say goodbye to my past. So I guess the end of my note was proper in every sense of the phrase, and he was right, he deserved that much of me.

_Goodbye Edward…. _I'd wrote_. There's you're proper goodbye…._

Little did I know, I would never have to say goodbye to him again….

* * *

><p>AN: I hope you guys like it...It was short, but aren't all my chapters? :P Love life and live it hard-FJ<p> 


	10. My Happy Friend?

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Ten**_

_**Isabella**_

"What is that Alice?" I asked as she pulled along side the unfamiliar red brick, two-story house.

"It looks like a flower company?" She asked unsure. "And a bakery company. Is that a sculpture?" she asked in ah, placing her left hand over her mouth.

I _knew_, before Alice got out of the car and inquired from a girl carrying two white chairs inside the house, asking if she knew what was going on, what was really taking place here today. And I _knew_ that since I told him to do this, that I had no right to stop it. So once Alice got back into her car I begged her to drive away. I couldn't do it, just like I told her weeks ago. And now, it was too late..._**  
><strong>_

_**Eight Years Later**_

"_Paging Dr. Swan. You're needed in_ _the emergency room."_ Came the monotone voice over the intercom.

"I guess I'm up ladies." I sighed as I left the Doctors lounge.

"Are you going to come out with us tonight Bell?" Sandy, the peds Doctor asked.

"I have to ask my guy, but I'll see." I promised.

"Tell him you need a night out with the girls, he'll understand." She yelled as I walked out of the lounge.

In the last eight years, I've completed med school, early to my amazement and I've finished my internship and I am now a resident at Seattle Grey hospital. And I don't want to gloat, but I'm the shit at what I do.

"Okay, okay, I'm here." I called as I entered the chaos that was my emergency room.

"We have a car accident," nurse Jen rattled off. "three car pile-up with one bike, six injured, one dead, and one critical care coming in. Mercy was too far away so we got the end."

"Okay ladies and gentlemen," I called out as the ambulance pulled up to the emergency entrance. "lets save a life."

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"So you won't go out with me, why? I don't see a ring on your finger so you can't say that you're married."

"Maybe I don't wear my ring because it rips my gloves." I told him off flippantly as I stitched the large gap in his arm.

"Or maybe you don't have one to wear. Therefore you don't have any excuses." He countered as if my tone wasn't a shot down in itself.

"Actually I have many excuses, Mr. Black. Beside, I don't date bikers."

"I'll throw the damn bike away. What do you say now?" he asked amused.

"I say you are heavily drugged, and you're starting to let it go to your head, Mr. Black"

"Jacob, please. Mr. Black is my father."

"Well, Jacob then. Besides, my bud hasn't even approved of you. How am I supposed to make a decision if my bud hasn't approved."

"You're bud? Is he like your 'happy friend'?"

"My 'happy friend'?" I asked as he looked embarrassed.

"You know, you're 'happy friend'." He pronounced the phrase, trying to get me to understand.

"No, I'm sorry I don't know what you're talking about." I fined ignorance, letting him squirm uncomfortably.

"You're _gay_ friend." He whispered. I laughed, shaking my head.

"Um, no, Anthony is actually not gay at all, I don't think."

The door swung open then, a little form about four feet stepping into the room.

"Oh, um, Dr. Swan, um, _mom_, um I don't know." He wined. "Aunt Alice told me to come get you, she's in the parking lot. She said something about her bag of water popping, or was it broken pipes. I don't know." Anthony exclaimed frantically. "All I know is that she's really scarring me. She pushed uncle Jasper. I think maybe he hurt himself. Help woman! I need help!" I stood, calling a nurse over to finish working on Mr. Black, as I darted for the door.

"So that's Anthony?" Mr. Black asked as I reached my son.

"The one and only." I told him before I turned back to Anthony. "Now tell me where they're parked at Anthony?"

"By that shiny black car."

"Okay, I know _exactly_ where that is. Go ask Peterson to show you where I stashed my afternoon candy, and I'll come get you from the lounge soon."

"Okay, good luck mom."

"Thanks kiddo." I ran out the side exit, the closes one to the parking lot. I knew exactly where that shiny black car was. It was in my parking spot, I know this because the words Dr. Swan is written on a sign in front of a spot where there is now a car that is not mine in it.

I ran down the rows of cars, tripping once, but not letting that phase me. "Alice!" I called out as I neared her new, red, family friendly Kia.

"Bella!" she yelled out. "I'm over here. Jasper hit his head on the car door and my water broke."

"I know about your water." I told her as I reached her side of the car. "But how did Jasper hit his head?" I asked her as I checked to see how she was doing; trying desperately to keep her mind off of her current situation.

"I pushed him. I didn't know that I'd pushed him that hard. Is he going to be okay?"

"Yes, he's going to be fine."

"And where is your car? I always park next to your car." She asked between deep breaths.

"Some ass took my spot. I have no idea whom this shiny piece of crap belongs to. Come on now Alice, I'm going to lift you and you and I will walk through those doors. I'll send a chair out for Jasper."

She nodded her head, squeezing her eyes as I helped lift her from the car. I leaned her against the shiny black car, putting prints on the new paint job. I smiled smugly as I helped my friend off of the car, making sure to touch it as much as possible.

"How many contractions have you had?" I asked her, back in Doctor mode.

"Two, they're thirteen minutes apart and Bella, they fucking hurt. I want to rip this kid out of me, but I know that will hurt worse."

I laughed, hoping to lighten the mood. "I know exactly what you mean, but I promise you the end result is awesome." It took us two minutes to walk into the hospital doors, a chair and Jen- the peds Doctor- waiting for us as soon as we entered. "How did you…"

"Your guy told me before he ate his way into a snickers bar. That kid of yours has got some chops Bella. I'll take her from here, and I'll keep you informed every step of the way."

"Thanks Jen." I leaned down, placed a kiss to Alice's head as she placed one to my shoulder. We'd seen that once on 'Whip It' between Bliss and her father. Now it's our thing. "Going in alive," I started.

"And coming out the same way." She finished between larger breaths.

"Larry?" I called, as Larry, an unofficial nurse, walked by with an empty wheel chair.

"Yes doctor Swan?"

"Follow me with that chair."

It was two hours later and everything seemed to be running smoothly. My ER was quiet, the board was being cleared in record time, the pit was empty, and Jasper woke up about twenty minutes after we got him checked out, but I knew the night was far from over.

And 'unpredictably,' I was right.

Jessica Stanley, a nurse who got where she is solely on her looks and good hand and oral cavity skills, passed by the board as I was erasing a surgery for Brat, another resident, with her gang of flies; Lauren Mallory and Irena Moore. They were going on about a new resident, one to just die for, one that all of them wouldn't mind sneaking into the supply closet with. I was sickened and pissed that there was a new guy that I didn't know about.

Who is he? And why Grey's? And god I hope he's not a chauvinistic pig.

Around eleven I found myself walking the short distance to the lounge, looking for my little guy. As soon as I entered the lounge I was hit with a very unfamiliar scene. "Whoa, whoa, whoa you guys, keep it on until you get home, or until I get my stuff and my kid." I said as I looked around the empty room for my son. "Have you guys seen-"

"Alice's room, get out Swan." Lisa a very, very horny nurse complained as she devoured some guys' neck.

"Take it to the bathroom Lisa, or how about this one, take it to the _nurses_ lounge."

"Tiffany already called that one." She said as she winked.

I grabbed my stuff and ran from the room as if it were on fire. That's so tasteless. I can't believe she would do _that_, there. Anyone could walk in, even the chief.

I walked upstairs to the delivery ward, Alice's room was at the far end of it, room 316. "Ally?" I called as I knocked on the door.

"Bella, thank good, get your son and this Jackass out of here. I can't believe I married him. I should have brought the father of my child instead of my lamn ass husband."

"Still no baby?" I asked, looking around at the guys. They were both on the floor, wearing toilet paper mask. Anthony's with red lips and Jasper's with pink lips.

"Nope." Anthony answered, popping the 'p' for exaggeration.

"Okay, how many centimeters are you now?"

"They slowed down; I've only dilated six centimeters. I have four more to go then I can start pushing. The anesthesiologist came in earlier, he was nice, I liked him a lot, he had lots of good drugs. "

"That's great Ally." I said looking at Jasper. He mouthed 'the drugs kicked in' and I nood my head knowingly. "I'm sorry, but I have to get Anthony downstairs and across the street to bed. He has school in the morning and he needs a bath and fresh clothes and his nice and warm bed."

"Thanks for being here Bells."

"You know I would do anything for you Ally, that's what sisters are for. Oh, hey Al, have you heard anything about a new resident?"

"Um kind of. I heard it was a guy, nice looking, supply closet worthy, and I heard he was married, but that was a while ago. I heard he's really good at what he does, which is really bad for any older staff members in his department. Why?"

"Stanley and her disciples were going on about getting him in the broom closet. I just wanted to know who the hell was coming into my Emergence room. Well I have to go, I'll be back in the morning around seven, or as soon as you call me and tell me the baby has been born."

"We'll call, I promise."

And so she did. Three-thirty this morning I was awoken to the sound of my cell phone ringing. I answered it only to get an ear full of harsh words and screaming. "I'm on my way!" I yelled down the phone, before running through my room and putting on my Jacket and my shoes. I ran down the hall of my two bedroom apartment to Anthony's room, fetching his jacket and shoes from the closet.

He was dressed and asleep in my arms once again. I ran down the stairs of my apartment building, my son in hands. I lived directly across the street from the hospital; all I had to do was run through the parking lot, so I ran, thankfully not falling once.

I ran into the hospital, going straight into the doctor's lounge to lay Anthony down. I took off, taking the elevator to the deliver ward, and racing to room 316. I heard the screaming before I saw any people. And that made me nervous, but I held my cool and speed to my best friend.

Nurses tried to flag me down as I ran, I flashed them my badge and passed them up. I was not in the mood for distractions. When I finally reached room 316 I was the happiest little brunet on the planet. I took a face cover from the bin on side of the door and peeked into the room just in time to see Alice push a head clean out of her 'whoha.' With one last push from Alice and pull from the person I knew was Jen, there was a bloody baby being held in the air.

"Congratulations," Jens familiar voice exclaimed through the air. "It's a… girl; unless I cut off the wrong wire." Jen joked.

"Thank you," I heard Jasper murmur to Alice. "Thank you so much baby. Thank you." He cried. Blubbering something about buying her something nice.

"You're welcome," Alice cried back. "She's so beautiful, and was so, so worth it. Bella," Alice called. "Bella are you here?"

"Over here Al, I caught everything." I assured her. "I even caught the part where Jasper promised to buy you a diamond for going through that much pain."

"Me too," she laughed through her tears. "And I have the perfect diamond for him to get, but Bella, you were right, it's so worth it. God she's beautiful, did you see her?"

"Yes, she looks just like her mommy. Congratulations girly. I'll be back in a little while to see my niece."

I quickly left the room, giving them the privacy they will never get again. I took my time walking downstairs to my son, savoring the moment as long as possible. I am so happy for Alice and Jasper. They have each other and now they have a beautiful little girl to share their love and time with. That little girl is going to have everything from designer clothes and shoes to a mother and father who love her and care for her.

And fuck me if I wasn't jealous of that little girl for my _son_ who I know would never be as green-eyed as I am at this very moment. And no, it's not for the nice things she'll have, its because she'll have both her parent there. It's because she had them there tonight.

That little girl who's barley been in the world for twenty minutes has the unconditional love of not only her mother, but her father. Her mother doesn't have to work her ass off to show her child that the love of one parent is enough to make up for both. That child, like so many others, like my son is not, is lucky enough to have both her parents and for that I am jealous for my son.

I walked into the lounge, tripping on the edge of the door and tumbling forward into one of the beds to the left of me. I tried to catch myself, but to no avail did I. I fell clean into the bed, landing on an unsuspecting sleeper.

"Shit!" a males voice growled as he shot out of bed, making me tumble to the floor.

"Sorry," I whispered, trying to keep my voice down as to not wake up Anthony. "I'm so sorry, I tripped over the damn door. Are you okay?"

"Is-Isabella?"

"Edward?" I murmured as his voice registered into my brain. "Fuck!" I exclaimed loudly.

"Mom!" Anthony scolded just as loud. Oh god.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:<strong> Okay, someone asked if Bella was going to have a baby...I guess I anwsered that. Honestly all the stories on my profile, except _Secret Circle_(**Which is awesome by the way...might want to check that out**) has a kid in it. I'm trying to get all the kid writting out of the way so I can get over that phase and move on to another one. Like _**kidnappers**_ and **_murders_** and **_toughella_** and **_hardassward_**...Or **_killerella_** and **_fixerward_** or **_copward_** and _**detectiveella**_. How about _**SWAT Swans**_ and **_Undercoverella_** and _fuck hot Edward_? I don't know yet, just let me get all the baby mojo out of the way.


	11. As I'll Ever Be

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Eleven**_

_**Edward**_

_**Eight Years Later**_

Fresh, that is the word that will define me now. Everything I'm doing from this day forwards I'm starting new, fresh. My divorce is finally finished, after all these years, and now I can begin to make progress, start over new. New home, new job, new. And where better to start then Seattle? It's close to my mother and father and my friends are already there. There's no better place to start.

Eight years ago my life was a mess. The girl of my dreams, the girl I've loved pretty much my entire life walked away from everything I wanted to offer her, leaving a note in her place, adamant about me keeping my promise to someone for once in my life. So she left and I couldn't find her, even though she asked me not to look in the first place, so I went back to the woman I'd made my latest promise to, Tanya Denali, just like Bella had asked of me.

A part of me loved Tanya, always will I guess, but she was not the woman I was _in love_ with, but I stayed with her, making her happy as best I could. And she was, for two years after the phone calls stopped. The phone calls that the girl of my dreams made every day for a month after the four months she'd disappeared. I didn't understand it, she told me to be happy and then she calls for one straight month out of the blue. I didn't even know she had my number, but I think our parents had something to do with that.

Tanya was upset, but when the calls stopped one day she was more than happy again. Two months after the calls stopped we were married. We both stayed at Dartmouth, her finishing her degree in the four years that was provided, and me finishing mine in three and a half.

I made myself study harder, longer. I took night classes and weekend classes, anything to keep my mind off of _her_, and my body away from my wife. I know what your thinking, what kind of husband doesn't want to sleep with his wife? Well, my answer would be the kind of husband who slept with Isabella Marie Swan before he was married.

After that night in the meadow with her, nothing could ever compare to what we shared. Yes, months after I went back to Tanya we began being intimate, but she just didn't feel right. Her skin wasn't the right shade, it didn't flush innocently. Her noises weren't the right sounds; her lips didn't have the right texture. She wasn't who I wanted, she was all wrong, but she was who I'd promised myself to.

On our honeymoon, as tradition, we slept together. Tanya 'mistakenly' forgot to tell me she left her birth control at home, so she became pregnant. She was so excited about the life growing inside of her. And so was I. It didn't matter anymore that Tanya wasn't who I wanted her to be, she was carrying my child so I had to make it work.

About five months into her pregnancy something went wrong and we lost our child. It was a boy, we'd found out the day we lost him. Tanya was a mess, and I was right alone with her. That child, _our_ child brought us together and without him our marriage slowly crumbled. One day, about a year after the lost of our unborn, I went home earlier then usual and found my wife in a compromising position with our carpenter. When I saw that, I knew our marriage was no longer crumbling, it was over. And for some reason, I felt light. I moved out, getting a lawyer quickly and began the motions for a divorce.

Tanya fought me on everything. She wanted everything, but all I had was our house, I was interning, barely making ends meat. I let her have the house with no complaints, taking my name off the deed and leaving her with all the back drift. In the end though, she lost, having to pay for my lawyer and having to pay me a large, _large_ amount of money. I only took half of what she had to pay me, and in the very, very end it turned out to be the amount I paid for the house in the first place. So nothing lost, nothing gained, until she fought me on that.

During the trial of the divorce I moved back to Forks with my parents, opting to finish out my inter with my fathers hospital. They accepted me with open arms, showing me the ropes and getting me comfortable with every possible position in the hospital, from Peds, to ER. I was completely thankful for the opportunity, and I let them know that every day.

When I'd done all I could with my father I decided it was time for me to stand on my own two feet, time for me to start fresh. So I wrote a letter of resignation and packed my bags and headed for the biggest city in Washington, Seattle. My father made a few calls on my behalf and got me a spot at Seattle Grey's. He told me and I quote; 'I can get you in the doors, but you have to show them what you're made of.' And I can't wait to do just that.

I brought an house two weeks ago when my lawyer let me know that my divorce was really final and that Tanya ended up caving after finding out if she dragged this out any longer she would end up owing me more then what she had to pay in the first place.

With my divorce settlement I brought myself a house; three bedrooms, two baths. The house was right in my price range and it fit me perfectly. My mother just 'had' to decorate it, so I gave her free range to do with it what she pleased, and I have to say she did an amazing job.

When I arrived at my house, it actually felt like home. My personal artifacts and pictures of my friends and family placed delicately throughout the house, making me feel even more at home then anything ever made me feel. I only had two days to myself before I had to go in for my first day at the hospital and I planned to us them to the best of my ability. So I called up someone I knew would help me out with that, someone who loves to party.

"Hey Emmett, you up for a beer?" Emmett and I kept in touch after college, he married Rosalie their last year and they moved to Seattle to be closer to the little family Emmett has left.

"Um I actually can't Eddie, Rose and I are celebrating; I knocked her up!" he exclaimed cheerfully over the phone. His voice was shortly followed by a thump, and moan. "Damn Rose that hurt."

"Language, you can't talk like that around the baby." I heard Rose rebuke in the background.

"Congratulations you two, I'm going to let you go, get back to…celebrating."

After ending my call with Emmett I called up another old college buddy, Ben, who'd moved to the suburbs with his college sweetheart, Angela, who'd he'd married and had a little girl, Gracie, with. He was also out of commission, his wife sick, leaving him to take care of his daughter. I was on my own with nothing to do, so I decided to call it a night and went to sleep.

I wasted the next day away in bed as well, opting to catch up on my sleep before my big day tomorrow. That day came sooner then I would have liked, my alarm blaring next to me, demanding that I wake up. I thumped it then started my morning ritual.

After two hours of getting dress, eating breakfast and lounging around a bit, I decided to go in, giving myself a few minutes to walk around, get the feel of the place. I drove my new beautiful black Volvo today, parking it in the first available spot I could find. I was so nervous that I gave myself a prep talk as I walked into the slid doors.

I was quickly intercepted by a nurse, a male nurse named Daniel. He was a cool guy, very intelligent and funny. He was appointed to be my tour guide until I got the hang of things.

As we walked through the hospital female nurse after female nurse stopped us, asking me personal questions, questions that didn't concern them in the least. I was very traverse with them, and tried vainly to remind them that this was our place of work, not a dating show. They didn't care.

As Daniel and I stepped into the elevator there was a call that came over the intercom, asking for a Doctor Swarm, or Doctor Swat, I'm not sure which, the elevator doors closed, cutting off the tedious voice. Daniel told me when they called for that doctor that meant there was serious business coming into the ER and they needed the big guns. I was impressed.

I got to meet the chief, and also a few attendees and residents. Everyone was more then welcoming, and I appreciated it all very much. Once I was done being showed around I was showed to the pit where I would be working until tomorrow morning. I was excited and I couldn't wait to start.

I'm so tired, my feet are killing me. After I got started in the pit, it seemed like everyone developed an illness. I was so frustrated with all the false alarms, and with the minor injures that could have been taken care of at home. When I was finally relived of my shift around four-twenty I was too tired to make it to my car. So I decided to just make do with a bed in the Doctors lounge for the night. Daniel had told me earlier that I was allowed to use it night or day.

When I entered I noticed one bed in the far right corner was occupied, the light from the hall not reaching far enough into the room for me to get a good look at the occupant. I settled for a bed on the left side of the room, the light also not reaching far enough into the room to disturb my sleep.

I was asleep for a good twenty to thirty minutes, my dreams refusing to come, but my mind stayed peaceful none the less, before I felt a heavy pressure on my face, cutting off my air supply. I jumped up, cursing loudly, and dumping whatever it was on me onto the floor.

"Sorry," someone whispered, keeping there voice down as not to disturb the other sleepers. "I'm so sorry; I tripped over the damn door. Are you okay?" and then I froze. Her voice was as clear as a sunny, cloudless day. It created goosebumps down my back, making my stomach clutch in reaction. I knew it was her, with all of my heart, and soul I knew it was _her_.

"Is-Isabella?" I breathed. My hands reaching blindly behind me for a light.

"Edward?" she murmured , knowing my voice almost instantly. "Fuck!" she exclaimed loudly.

"Mom!" A boy shouted from across the room from me. Mom?

The light went on then, my eyes closing and opening quickly. Isabella's hand was on the light switch, trembling. I looked away from it, meeting her brown orbs. She looked so beautiful, yet so frighten. I looked around the room, my eyes landing on a little boy, his hair brownish-red like Bella's, his eyes a seafoam green like...mine. And they were wide too, just as I expected mine were.

"Isabella-" I began, my eyes still glued to the little boy that, besides his hair, was a little copy of… me.

"Let's grab a coffee, Edward." she said quickly, I looked at her as she opened the door. "Anthony, sleep." She ordered. I looked back at the boy who was still staring at me in awe. I knelt down, grabbing my shoes and jacket from the ground and followed her out of the room.

We walked in silence, her leading the way to the cafeteria. I can't believe that after all these years she's here, with…_my_ son. We have a _son_…_together_; a son that I know absolutely nothing about.

As we entered the cafeteria she motioned for me to have a seat, while she went to go get the coffees. I was still shell shocked. Eight years ago we ended up in the same place, now here we go again, eight years _later_ in the same damn place. Only this time there was a kid who looked a helluva lot like me.

"I hope you still like it black?" she asked as she sat a hot cup of black coffee in front of me.

"Yeah, thanks." She took a seat, bringing her cup to her lips and blowing lightly. We were once again consumed by silence. "So-"

"So-" we both tried at the same time. I motioned for her to go first, but she shook her head, giving me the right away.

"He's beautiful, Bella. Looks a lot like-"

"You?" she asked, her eyes locking with mine.

"Yes, but I also see your dad in him too. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I tried." She whispered. And before I tried to call her out on that, before I could tell her that she was a liar, she finished. Only she didn't have to, because I knew instantly what she meant when she said she tried.

"That's what you kept calling for?" she nodded, shifting her gaze for the first time. "Why didn't you continue to try after that? I mean he's my _son_ Bella. I would have thought you would have tried a bit harder."

"I did. After the twice a day phone calls went unanswered, Alice convinced me to try harder. So I wrote. I wrote a letter a day for a month. When that fell through I decided to try one more time. I was seven months pregnant at the time so Alice had to drive me, but she didn't have a problem with that. It was a month after the letters went unanswered, it was the first time I could get away from anything. We map quested your address and Alice drove me straight to your front door. When we got there everything was a mess, trucks upon trucks of flowers, and chairs and a wedding cake. You were getting married and I refused to stop it, so I made Alice drive me back home. I never tried again. I wrote Esme a few times, asked her how you were. She wrote back that you and Tanya were expecting…."

"Tanya miscarried the baby. It was going to be a _boy_, but…Does he know who I am, Bella?"

"Yes, I talk to him about you all the time. He has pictures of you from college, and some that Esme sent through the mail. He knows about all of you."

"Does Esme and Carlisle know about him?" I asked accusingly.

"No, I wanted you to know before them. I was going to try to work up enough courage to find you again in a few years, when Anthony got older."

"That's his name, Anthony?" I asked as I stared at her intently.

"Yes, Anthony Charles Swan." She glanced at me, and I smiled acceptably. It was _perfect_.

"And he's seven?"

"Yes, he turns eight on October 1st. He refused to come out until then. I was weeks overdue." She smiled, remembering.

"And he's healthy? Nothing went wrong during your pregnancy, his birth?" I asked worried.

"Everything went fine Edward. He was healthy all nine months. He came out screaming, his lungs were perfect. And he's been healthy ever since. He started kindergarten this year, he loves it. Um, when he's not at school, he's here at the day care center, or he's over at Alice and Jasper's with Jasper. The doctors and nurses love him here, they all treat him great. He's perfect Edward." She assured me.

"That's good, that's really good. When do I get to meet him?"

She sighed, looking over at the clock on the far wall from the door. "He has to be up in a few hours to go home and get dressed for school, so you could meet him then. Although I think you excited him enough for the night." She reminded me amused. "Did you see his eyes? I thought they would come out."

I laughed with her, remembering my son's face as he took me in. I guess its one thing to see a picture and a wholly other to see the person standing in front of you in the flesh. After we both let our laughter die out I looked at her, and she at me. There was so much that needed to be said, but we were both beat. I just wanted to meet my son and then sleep for a few hours and wake up to get to know him.

"Bella,"

"Later please, I just want to concentrate on Anthony right now. We can talk when we drop him off at school. Do you have an early shift?"

"No, I have the pit until the doctor in the ER needs me."

"Me, you'll be working with me?" she asked surprised.

"You, I thought the doctor in the ER was named Swarm, or Swat…? Swan, of course. I guess it's up to you then."

"I'll probably need you tomorrow; it's the big bike race on the main street. Things are going to get a bit dicey. I'm going to need all the man power I have. So you have an evening shift, come in around noon, no later. We can talk about Anthony at my place; you can even sleep on the couch until noon. I'm going to need you well rested for your shift. So are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be."


	12. If Time Permits

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Twelve**_

_**Edward**_

I followed her as she walked back to the lounge, my mind working in over time. This is like bittersweet, after all these years of wishing for her she's been right here. Not even two hours from Forks. I guess she couldn't completely let it go, me go.

We reached the lounge shortly after leaving the cafeteria, Anthony fast asleep. Bella went straight into the bathroom, turning the light on in there and propping the door open so the light shined into the lounge just right. She went about her business, picking up Anthony size clothing, and shoes. There were a few toys in the corner that she grabbed, stuffing everything into a black tote bag and swinging the bag across her back.

She moved over to Anthony; lifting the covers from his body and picking him up gently. He laid his head on her shoulder, his body secured in her arms. She held on to him tightly as she walked back to the bathroom and turned the lights out, finding the lounge door like a pro in the darkness. They seemed like they had everything down, like this was something that happened regularly. But then again she did mention he spent a lot of time here.

I gathered my things quickly and followed her as she took the short walk through the hospital to reach the slide doors. Staff members greeted her as she walked pass, a lot of them with the highest level of respect. That made me wonder what exactly Isabella Swan did throughout the eight years we were apart. One thing was obvious; she'd made a name for herself.

We walked out of the slide doors, Isabella heading through the parking lot, looking back to see if I were still there. I gave her a reassuring smile, letting her know that I wasn't going anywhere. I followed her and followed her, and as we passed my car she stopped, looking at it then at me.

"Yours?" she asked nodding towards my Volvo.

"Yeah, I just got it." I stated proudly.

"You parked in my spot, next time I'll have it towed." I gasped, my mouth going slack.

"You would do that to me?" I asked in mock horror, my hand going to my heart dramatically.

"I worked hard for that spot." She shrugged. She turned and continued to walk, heading towards the nice looking six story building across the street.

Inside the building was an elevator that was out of order, so we had to climb four story's of stairs to get to her apartment on the fourth floor. I offered to hold Anthony, but Bella refused, saying she was more then capable. I nodded, but watched her carefully the entire time we walked up the stairs. She was known for her walking accidents.

Once we reached the fourth floor Bella lead me to apartment 26C, the door a dirty brown, the paint chipping. The building was nice from the outside, but the inside was a different story. It was old, torn, and not in the lease bit livable. But then she opened her apartment door and my entire demeanor changed. It was amazing. Not a piece of paint out of place. An amazing living room set and an area for Anthony to play. It was there home.

"Have a seat, I'm just going to lay him down for another hour and we can talk." She motioned me towards the light brown couch and I sat down; my frame relaxing into the cushion. "I still can't believe you're the new guy." She said as she walked back into the living room.

"I can't believe on some level you're my boss."

"Well you better start believing that buddy. I worked hard for my position. I never knew the medical world was so cut throat."

"Why?" I asked, not able to hold it in with polite chatter any longer.

"I needed you to keep your promise to her."

"Why? I wasn't lying to you in the meadow. I gave her up for you. I had my chance to follow her, but I came after you. I wanted _you_. I've always wanted you. You should have stayed and I could have told you all of that, instead you ran."

"I needed you to keep the promise you made Edward. I needed you to do that for yourself, for me. Do you have any regrets…marrying her, do you regret it?"

"Every day, every day I regret giving up looking for you and marrying her. Every day of my life Isabella, I regret being with her. The only thing I don't regret is her carrying my child. But when we lost him, I had nothing left. Because everything I _ever_ wanted was with you. So tell me now and please come up with a better response then what you've been feeding me. _Why did you leave_?"

"I wanted to see if I could find a life outside of you. If I could fall in love with someone else. If it was so easy for you to move on like that than why not me? I spent my entire life loving you Edward, only to find out that you forgot about me, you'd moved on. I needed to see if I could do that too, if I could move on. I had to give myself a fair chance."

"And how did that go?"

"It didn't. Like you I have regrets."

"Are you done searching for that life?" I asked.

"I was done the moment I found out about Anthony."

"Then come home…with _me_. Make us a family and come home." I begged.

"Are we just supposed to pick up where we left off, Edward? I can't do that, not just to me, but Anthony. It can't be the same, things have to change."

"I'm all about change," I guaranteed her. "starting over fresh. I want you and Anthony to move into my house with me. I want to be a family with you and my son. I've always wanted you, please Isabella, let me have you."

She looked at my pleading face, tears cascading down her cheeks. "Okay," she said nodding. "when do we get to move in?"

"Really?" I asked, moving to kneel in front of her. "Please don't be playing with me Isabella."

"Edward it's always been you, since the moment you sat next to me in the piano room it's been you. So no, I'm not playing. If you want us to move in then we'll move in."

"Mom!" our son called out from his room. I reached over, wiping away her tears.

"Is it too soon to say I love you?"

"If you don't say it I know a great ER doctor that would love to have you as a patent." She smiled.

"I love you…so, so much Isabella and I promise you that _that_ will never ever change. For as long as I live _that_ will never change."

"I have two questions, and I need you to answer them honestly."

"Okay."

"First, how long have you been single, and lastly, are you sure you're ready for this?"

"For six years. After Tanya lost the baby we fell completely apart. We were going down hill before that, but once the baby was gone there was nothing there for me. The next year I found her in bed with our carpenter. I filed for a divorce the next day. And yes, I'm more than ready to have my family, to _be_ a family with _you_."

"Anthony, I'm in here!" she yelled back to our son after awhile, her eyes still on me.

There was a silent moment before we heard foot steps on the linoleum; Anthony coming into view shortly after. "Ma?" he said, looking over at Bella. "Are you okay?" he glanced at me, his eyes going wide yet again when he saw that I was looking right back at him.

"I'm fine, come here bud, I want you to meet someone. Do you remember him from the pictures? His name is Edward" she asked as she picked him up and sat him on her lap.

He nodded his head, turning to face me. "I thought I was dreaming when I saw you." Anthony said speaking to me.

"No, I was there. So you're Anthony…my son? You look a lot like me, except for-"

"My hair," he finished. "I have my Grandpa Charlie's hair."

"Yeah, you do. So I asked your mom something and now I'm going to ask you, okay?" he nodded, looking at his mother, who smiled, then back to me.

"Okay,"

"Would you like to move into my house with me? You'd still have your own room, and your mom and I would be just up the hall. You'll have your own play room and a back yard to play in as well. Would you like that, Anthony?"

He bit his lip, looking once more at his mother then back to me. "Mom would be coming too? We wouldn't be leaving her, right?"

"Mom would be coming too." I assured him. "Are you in?"

"One more thing. Will you ever leave us again? I know ma said she's the one that left first, but will you ever leave us now?"

"I will never go anywhere without you and your mother again Anthony. You're my son and your mother is the love of my life, we're going to be a family now, forever."

"I'm in." he said without hesitation. "When do we get to go home?" he asked, looking at his mother.

"You heard our boy, when do we get to go home?" Bella asked looking at me.

"As soon as grandma Esme can fuse our things together and design Anthony's room. So the end of next week most likely, until then we could stay here. That's if you guys don't mind me imposing?"

"This is your home as long as we're here Edward."

"Yeah dad." I looked at Anthony, my eyes burning from unabashed tears. I smiled brightly at him, grabbing him unexpectantingly from his mothers lap and swinging him in the air. "Dad!" he yelled in excitement.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

The next few days went by like the second hand on a clock. It was so amazing and fulfilling that I never wanted it to end. I'd gone home after my shift was over the next night to get some clothes, Anthony went with me and when I say he loved the house, he loved the house. I showed him around, telling him where he would be sleeping, and where his mother and I would be sleeping. When I showed him the back yard he suggested we get a pool, and a dog. I was all for it.

We spent late nights and early mornings at the apartment as a family and evenings at the hospital, Anthony in daycare. I saw Jasper again, and Alice. They both welcomed me back, Alice a little hesitant. Bella assured me that she was just trying out her new mother instincts; but I didn't care, nothing could bring me down; not Alice, not the pit and certainly not the female population in this hospital.

"Dr. Cullen," an sickly familiar voice called. I knew instantly that it was nurse Stanley and I tried in vain to avoid her, because she just didn't take no for an answer.

"Yes nurse Stanley?" I asked, pretending to look at a chart to avoid her face.

"I was just wondering if you were busy tonight. And if not I was thinking we could grab a couple of drinks."

"Um tonight? I'm actually very busy tonight Nurse Stanley. If you'll excuse me I have patents to see." I ran away quickly, rounding the corner and running into my Bella.

"Edward," she said as she grabbed me, stopping herself from falling. "What's gotten into you?"

"Um…nothing," I said looking behind me, and around me. "I was just headed to do my rounds. What are you doing? Where is Anthony?"

"Edward, he's at school, remember? Susan will pick him up and drop him off here with her son Seth and they'll stay in daycare until my shift is over or until Susan gets off from work. She'll pick up Seth and then Anthony will usually roam the halls, against my wishes. Is that all, you seem kind of wired."

"I'm fine, I'm fine, I promise. How about after Seth leaves I pick him up? That way the teacher can go home early. Just tell her to leave him in reception and I'll pick him up from there. That way he doesn't have to roam and get in the way." I assured her, taking a deep breath and smiling at her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure, I promise. I could take him out of this place, maybe go catch a movie if time permits. Then we'll meet you at home for dinner." I assured her.

"Okay, well I'm going to go check on my emergence room. And then I'm going to go check on Alice, and then I'm going to go run to the market and pick up a few things for dinner tonight. Because if I interpreted the schedule correctly and I think I did, we have the night off. So I'll see you and our little man later?"

"Of course you will. I love you." I murmured as I leaned in for a quick kiss.

"I love you too, Edward. I'm so happy you're back in my life, in _our_ life." She whispered against my lips. "I'll see you later."

I watched her walk away, my eyes instantly going to her ass. She had a nice ass. When she was gone from sight I turned to see that no one had noticed our exchange. I was wondering if anyone knew that Bella and I were together besides Alice and Jasper. I mean the nurses still asked me out so I figured they didn't know, but does anyone ask my Bella out? Doctors, male nurses…The thought had my stomach turning.

"Doctor C." Douglas, one of the male nurses on my rotation called from the end of the hall I was standing on.

"Yeah?"

"There's someone here to see you. He's waiting for you at the front desk."

"Thanks Doug. Did he give a name?"

"No!" he shouted as he retreated.

I took my time making it into the reception area. My mind going through possible people that would come visit me during work; my dad, my mom… Bella was already here. Jasper, no, he was upstairs with Alice. Anthony is going to be in school for a while longer…Who would-

"Eddie!" I looked up to see a smiling Emmett and a very agitated Rosalie.

"Emmett, what are you doing here, man!" I exclaimed happily, giving him a half hug and a pat on the shoulders.

"We came to see how you were doing at work. Can you get a break; we want to take you out for a drink?"

"Um, yeah, just give me a second to finish up my charts and I'll be right with you guys. Hey Rose."

"Hello Edward." She greeted quietly.

It took a while, but Rosalie finally warmed up to me, slightly. She still gives me the cold shoulder every now and then, but I think we've grown to the stage of nickname.

I finished my charts in record time. I missed spending time with Emmett. I hadn't talked to him since he told me he knocked Rose up. This was perfect. A little time with an old friend, then I would be home in time for a few long hours with my girl. Could it get any better?

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

The bar was pleasant. Emmett and I found ourselves doing a few shots, Rose opting to drink water and orange juice. I wish Isabella would have come with us. She would have enjoyed seeing our old classmates.

Driving home I found myself thinking about the next few years. I knew there was so much more to come for Isabella and I. Marriage, children, a future. And we would have it all. It had to be written in the stars somewhere that her and I belonged. I mean, who could have possibly thought us meeting again was chance? It had to have been fated. Is fate.

I walked into our apartment building, the silencing deafening. I quickly climbed the stairs, floor after floor. When I reached our stairway I walked through the exit door and headed for our apartment. Unlocking the door I instantly picked up the smell of cold sauce and forgotten cheese. Yum, food. I walked further into the apartment, placing my keys on the living room table. the loud clink made me jump, and Isabella sitting on the couch made me gasp.

Fuck, she looks pissed._**  
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><p><strong>AN:<strong> Umm...It looks like Eddie's forgetting something...or someone. And Isabella Looks like she's ready to for reading. I hoped you guys liked it.


	13. Big Boy's and Speeding Cars

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Thirteen**_

_**Isabella**_

I left the hospital soon after visiting Alice and Jasper. Making my way to the local market to pick up a few fresh tomatoes and a few branches of fresh oregano for my sauce, also grabbing a few movies for Edward and me to watch when Anthony goes to sleep.

I was so excited that my life was finally going the way it should have been going all along. I have the man of my dreams with me, finally. And I have the perfect son of all time. Could life get any better?

No, I thought as I answered my earlier question about life getting better. It can't.

I'd cooked dinner over two hours ago and Anthony and Edward was still nowhere in sight. I phoned Edward, but he didn't answer, his phone sending me straight to voicemail. Where is he? I thought pacing the living room. And where in the hell is my son?

Part of me felt that something was off. It just didn't feel right that Anthony wasn't home yet. And it didn't ease my mind that Edward wasn't answering his phone. I understand if he took him to a movie, but that should have ended hours ago.

After another thirty minutes passed, I decided to go back to the hospital. Maybe they were there walking around and Edward was in a section that didn't allow cell phones because of the machinery.

I grabbed my jacket, keys and my tennis shoes and headed for the door. I locked up quickly and ran down the stairs of the apartment complex. I was on the sidewalk in no time at all, the street busy with speeding cars. Just as I was about to cross the street I heard it, an echo of horns, all going off at once. I looked over in the general direction of the sound and couldn't help but scream. Anthony, my son, my little boy, was trying to cross the street by himself, his face stricken with fear.

My mind went into overdrive, my life meaningless to me as I ran through the street. The horns blared in my ears as I ran for my son. "Anthony," I screamed trying to get his attention. "Anthony, just stay there!" He didn't hear me as he stepped further into the traffic. "Oh Anthony, god no!"

I screamed bloody murder as an eighteen-wheeler sped down the road in the lane that my son was currently standing in. I pushed myself, my legs carrying me to heights I've never been before. The truck was feet's away but before I knew it I was there, in front of Anthony, grabbing him by his waist and swinging him with me onto the next lane over and running for the sidewalk. The truck driver blared his horn behind us, as I glued myself to my son.

"Are you okay?" I asked quickly, my brain retuning to me and clicking into doctor's mode. "Did you get hurt at all?" I asked lifting his eyelids and looking into his pupils. They were dilated to almost nothing. He was in shock. "Anthony its mommy, you're going to be okay, can you hear me? Please talk to me baby?" I begged.

"M-mommy…" he cried, holding on to me tighter.

"I know baby, I know. Mommy's so sorry. I should have been there. I should have been there. I'm so, so, so sorry, baby."

"I thought I could do it. I thought I could be a big boy." He cried.

"You are a big boy baby. You were so brave, but Anthony you need a bigger boy to help you cross the street. You never cross it alone. Do you hear me? Never alone, I told you that." I cried into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry mommy." He sniffled.

"I know sweetie. Are you okay, you didn't hurt yourself did you?" I asked repeating myself.

"I fell once, on my arm. It hurts, but I got up and tried again."

"Well let me get you home and I'll take a look at your arm for you, okay bud?"

"Okay mommy. Where's daddy?" he asked as he rested his head on my left shoulder while resting his sore arm between us.

"I don't know, but when he comes home you'll know."

0o0o0o0o0o

Midnight, the clock flashed, displaying the time to be midnight. That's when the front door creaked open and a smiling Edward came walking into the living room. He took his jacket off, threw his keys on the stand by the door, removed his shoes and began to walk further into the apartment. That's when he saw me.

I was settled on the couch, his dinner waiting in front of me on the living room table and my fist balled so tightly at my sides my knuckles hurt. "Isabella, what are you doing up so late? I thought I'd just crawl in next to you." He walked over to me, bending down and trying to kiss my mouth. I turned my head and he grazed my cheek instead. "What's wrong baby?" he breathed against my neck.

I smelt the alcohol on his breath and that just pissed me off further. "Where have you been?"

"I went out with Emmett and Rosalie. Do you remember them from college? We had a few drinks to celebrate my job and the fact that Emmett knocked Rose up. I also told them that we were back together and that we have a son who looks just like me and you." He finished in a lustful whisper.

"Speaking of our son, do you know where he is?" I asked, angrily, moving my face again as his lips tried to touch mine, again.

He leaned away from me, looking into my eyes confusedly. "What do you mean 'do I know where he is,' he's in his bed."

"Are you sure?" I asked with a hint of fake uncertainty. "Because when I came home you and he were still out. I thought you guys were at the movies, you know, like you'd promised you'd take him if time 'permitted.' So, I'm guessing since you had a few drinks with friends, time 'permitted.' So where is Anthony, where's our son, Edward?"

"Isabella, cut the shit." He asked, now as serious as a sober person. "Where is Anthony, where's my son?"

"You want me to cut the shit Edward!" I screamed in his face. He stood, taking a few steps back. "Fine, I'll cut the shit. Do you really want to know where _our_ son is? Then let me tell you. Anthony Charles Swan is in our bed sleeping on the left side, your side, while his body is shifted on his right side, because he sprung his left arm tonight, and it hurts when he puts pressure on it.

"Anthony Charles Swan is sleeping with his mother tonight because every twenty minutes he wakes up in a sweat, which I presume he'll be doing until he gets the images out of his head. Anthony Charles Swan is suffering from post traumatic stress because he almost got hit by not one, but at least ten cars and a fucking eighteen wheeler Edward Anthony, from trying to cross the fucking street alone!"

"What?" he shouted.

"I could have lost my goddamn son tonight! And where were you, his father, and the man that promised to take him this evening? You were out drinking it up with a few old college friends while your _son_ nearly lost _his_ life. While _I_ nearly lost _my_ life!

"I should hate you. I should kick your ass. I want to hit you so much. I will hit you!" I said as my hand came up and struck his face. He didn't flinch, opting to just take the lick. So I did it again, and again, until I was pounding on to his chest. "Why weren't you there, you promised to be there? We could have lost him. I could have lost my baby boy."

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry…." He cried as he chanted his apology over and over into my ear.

"You weren't there. You promised Edward, you promised." I cried.

"I know baby, I'm so sorry. It will never happen again. Never again, I'm so sorry."

A scream had me detaching myself from Edward and quickly running to our room. Anthony was sitting straight up in the middle of the bed. I rushed to his side, Edward staying at the door, wiping his face clean of tear residue.

"Mommy?"

"Yeah buddy, I'm right here. Are you okay?" I asked concerned. My hands feeling along his forehead.

"My head hurts a little." He said with a yarn. His eyes were heavy, sleep inescapable.

"That's to be expected kiddo, but I'll go get you a few children Tylenol, okay? Is there anything else you want?"

"I want daddy. Is he home yet?"

"I'm right here buddy." Edward answered in a strained voice, the tears that no longer showed on his face evident in his voice.

"I'll go get your pills and leave you here with your father. I'll be right back."

I quickly ran across the room to mine and Edwards's bathroom, searching through the medicine cabinet for the small tablets. I found the tablets and filled the glass next to the sink with some water and walked out to see Edwards face in Anthony's sleeping shoulder, sniffles, and whispers of him being sorry leaving his mouth.

I cleared my throat, announcing that I was back, but he didn't rise from his position, opting to just stay attached to Anthony for the night. I walked over to my side of the bed, setting the glass and the pills down on my nightstand. I climbed into bed behind my son and as soon as I was attached to him Edward grabbed my left hand, intertwined his right one with mine, and held it over Anthony's back.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I'm so sorry."

"I know. I know you are Edward. But please, don't ever let it happen again. I can't lose him."

"I can't lose either of you." He whispered lightly.

0o0o0o0o0o0

He's gotten better. After the incident Edward, when his schedule permits it, picks Anthony up from the daycare every time. I never have to remind him and he never forgets. It has unquestionably and self inflictingly, become his job to know where Anthony is at all times. He's gotten better at it, already knowing where Anthony's favorite places are in the hospital.

Today, however, is not a daycare day. Today is the day that both Edward and I are off and it's also move-in day and meet the grandparent's day. Anthony is more than enough excited for the both of us about meeting his grandpa and grandma. He even made them something at school just for this day.

"What time will they be here?" I yelled through the house to Edward who was in the living room packing the last of Anthony's baby pictures.

"They should be here around noon love!" He yelled back.

"Okay! Anthony, did you pack your toys like your father asked?" I asked him as his dinosaur swooped in and killed his J.I Joe. I know, but he's seven.

"Yes ma'am. He has the box in the living room, next to your box of books."

"Thanks kiddo. Why don't you go see if your daddy needs any help?"

"Okay." He said excitingly, running through the house.

"Be careful Anthony Charles!" I screamed after his vanishing form. I heard the exact moment that he made it to his father, a light crash announcing his arrival.

"Anthony-" Edward got out before he was cut off by Anthony's reassurance.

"I'm fine dad. I promise."

"Alright," Edward sighed. "You have to be more careful kid. You have to watch out for that arm. And Thanks to your mom you weren't born with the best equilibrium."

"Hey!" I shouted from the doorway. "I resent that!"

Seconds after my comment I heard my two guys give a loud throaty laughter that filled my insides with heat. I am always grateful that Edward and Anthony's relationship was easy. I thought for sure that Anthony would claim-up, like he does when he meets most people, but he made me proud and accepted Edward as his father instantly. It made me know that showing him the pictures of Edward and our family was the right thing.

We worked hard packing the rest of our things into boxes before Esme and Carlisle were to arrive. I was so nervous to see them, everything in my body telling me that they'll be disappointed in me for not telling them about Anthony. I mean Esme and I write each other at least three times a month and not once did I let her know that I was pregnant or that Anthony was for Edward. I felt horrible, but I don't think I would have done it any differently if I were given the chance.

Along with Esme and Carlisle we were expecting Alice and Jasper to get here soon with Hailey Marie Whitlock, my niece. Jasper was helping us move and Alice wanted contact with a human that could reply with something other than a gurgle. I on the other hand wished I could go back in time when Anthony gurgled. He's growing so rapidly that I'm afraid I will miss something important in his life. That he won't need me soon.

"Love we have company." Edward announced, standing in the door way.

"Who?" I asked nervously.

"Mom and dad." He said sympathetically. He walked over to me, kneeling beside me. "Babe, they're not going to be angry with you. You have to stop worrying about it so much Isabella. You did what you thought was right for you and Anthony and they could never be angry at you for that. You're his mother and if you make a decision that you think is best for him you shouldn't second guess it. Come on, they're waiting for us."

I nodded my head, grabbing his hand as he offered it to me. "Where is Anthony?"

Edward laughed; his eyes sparkling with amusement. "He ran in his room when the door bell rung. I think he is just as nervous as you are. Come on, let's go get our son and introduce him to our parents."

He led me out of our room and across the hall to Anthony's empty room. He was there, sitting in the middle of the floor Indian style and staring at the wall before him. "Anthony?" I called out softly.

Without turning he spoke. "Will they like me?" he asked, his voice shaking a little.

"No," I answered honestly. Edward looked over at me, his eyes wide and confused. I smiled at him, assuring him I knew what I was doing. "They'll love you kiddo."

"You said that about dad." He reminded me matter of fact.

"And was I wrong? Does your father not love you? Do you not love him Edward?" I asked Edward playfully.

With an exaggerated sigh Edward took on the job of parenting. "I guess I sort of, kind of, maybe like him, but love… that I do, with my whole heart. Anthony," Edward called. Anthony turned his head and looked at him nervously. "My whole heart is what I love you with. And our parents, _your_ grandparents, will love you with theirs unquestionably."

"Will they leave me someday?"

"No, they'll always be here, Anthony, always." Edward promised.

"Okay, I'm ready." He exclaimed confidently as he stood and walked up to me and Edward, holding both his hands out, one for each of us to take. "Let's go say Hello."


	14. And You Let Him?

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Fourteen**_

_**Isabella**_

He was happy.

Anthony walked into the living room between Edward and I with his head held high, and in less then twenty minutes Esme and Carlisle were wrapped around his little fingers. And our son was happy.

Immediately he took to Carlisle, calling him grandpa and asking him when he'll teach him how to fish. That brought tears to my already misting eyes. Charlie was supposed to teach him, like he'd taught me.

I greeted Esme and Carlisle like I hadn't seen them in eight years…because I _haven't_ seen them in eight years. I fell into Esme's hands, more tears slipping from the corner of my eyes, but that was nothing to the heart breaking sobs rolling from me as I hugged Carlisle. He just hugged me closely and promised me that it would be alright. When he released me Edward was there, enveloping me in his arms and walking me to a nearby kitchen chair. That was all that was left of the furniture in the front of our home.

After all the greetings were done and my blubbering moment was over, we got to work. Edward and I finished our room, while Anthony helped his grandparents in the living room with the rest of my books. Alice and Jasper showed up with Hailey soon after noon and they got to work while Anthony moved his focus from his grandparents to his 'cousin'. It always surprises me how Anthony took to Hailey Marie so fast. He adores her and for now she feels the same way about him.

We all worked hard loading the rental truck, sweat rolling down our bodies, our clothes sticking to our clammy skin, but eventually we got it done. After we were all finished, the house cleared, the truck filled, I ordered pizza for everyone and Edward ran to the store to get a few cases of beer and a few juice boxes for Anthony. We sat around the empty living room, laughing and smiling, all of us ignoring the big pink elephant in the room.

There is so much to discuss, yet here we are, all tip toeing around it. And as much as I wish that no one would ever bring it up, I know that it's inevitable. And I refuse to have this hanging over my head for the rest of my life.

"I'm sorry." I blurted out, directing my attention to Esme and Carlisle. "I should have told you, you had a right, but I couldn't risk you telling Edward, I couldn't risk his happiness. But when he came here and I found out about Tanya, I realized my decisions were stupid. He had a right to know no matter what and so did you. I took Anthony away from you, all of you and that was wrong of me. And for that I am so sorry."

"Baby," Edward started, but I shook my head, not wanting him to comfort me.

"Esme-" I started, but was quickly cut off.

"Isabella," she whispered her eyes misting. "I'm not angry; I'm confused as to why you felt that you couldn't trust us anyway. You wrote all those letters to me and not once did you mention Anthony. I would have loved to have known about him, but we get him now, so for that I am grateful. I'm not angry Isabella. You don't know how excited I am to be a grandmother, how excited I am to know that you and Edward have this beautiful boy together, that you two _are_ together. I am as happy as I have ever been in life."

"But you must-" I begin to insist.

"Isabella," Carlisle called, interrupting me this time.

"Dad?" I wined helplessly. He smiled, reaching across the pizza to take my hand.

"_That_, Isabella is why we are not angry. You are our daughter, how could we ever be angry with you? It was your right as his mother, no reason, or explanation is necessary. Come now; let's finish our meal so we can get over to the new house and get you guys' settled in, as a family."

So we did just that. After lunch was done with and cleaned up, we packed ourselves in our respective vehicles, Carlisle driving the moving truck- and made our way through downtown until we reached the quite suburbs of outer Seattle. Getting to work every day will be a longer commute then I'm used to, but it shouldn't be a problem if I leave slightly earlier. The great thing about the entire move is that Anthony made it, just barely, but still made it in the same school district.

As I pulled along the curve of our new house I couldn't help the gasp that left my mouth. Anthony snickered as my hand came to my mouth. Besides Charlie's house, Esme and Carlisle's and a few months in Alice's house I'd never stayed in a house long enough to call it mine. But this house, it was mine, _ours_. Edward, Anthony and I, and no one can take it away from us.

I froze when my door opened, Edward standing there. He reached in, his hands coming up to cup my cheeks. With the tips of his thumbs he gently wiped the tears away from my skin, his lips brushing against mine softly. "What's wrong babe?"

"Nothing, I'm just…I am so happy that I can call this my home, with you and Anthony. Nothing has ever felt like home to me, not really, not until this. I fell like everything is coming together, finally, but there is this tugging at the back on my spin that's telling me to hold on to something tight because something's going to come and blow this happiness from under me."

"Nothing, _nothing_ or no one will take this away from you. This is yours baby, all you. I won't allow anyone into that door that I think will mess with your peace. Our home will be filled with good energy and good people. No one with a hint of anger will step into that door or get anywhere near you or Anthony. I will lay my life on the line before I let anyone mess this up for you, do you hear me?"

"Yes, I do. I love you Edward."

"I love you too baby. Come on; let me show you around the place. Anthony's already decided we'll need a pool, oh, and a dog…."

I laughed as Edward led me out of the car and toward the one story, two garage house. I loved the fact that it was brick, everything brick, a dark tan brick, but the door, of course, and the windows. The door was white, golden handle. It was held wide open with a box that was marked 'Books x 2' written in Edward's beautiful script.

The foyer was medium size and very homey. Edward led me through it and straight towards the living room, which was dramatic and complete with a framey light fixture. I gaped. He gently pulled me away from the living room and towards the kitchen, I was done. I didn't need to see anything else. The kitchen was a chef's wet dream. Stainless steal appliances, glass cupboard doors, glass refrigerator doors. Sigh.

"Can we sleep in here?" I asked Edward as he smiled over at me.

"If you wish it." He replied amused.

"I don't have to see anything else to know that this is perfect for us, for our family. Thank you so much Edward. You are the best thing next to our son that could have ever happened to me. And I promise you that as long as I live I will never take you for granted. I love you."

"I love you too baby, forever. Let's hurry with the packing so we can finally get our home to ourselves with our son." I nodded and with his hand linked in mine we head towards the moving truck.

Five hours. Five hours is how long it took us to haul in every box, unpack every box and decorate the entire house. After feeding everyone 'thank you' pizza they were on their way and Edward, Anthony and I were left sprawled out in our living room on the floor with our heads drawn together. Edward held my left hand and Anthony took the right. We were done.

"Ma," Anthony called sluggishly.

"Yeah bud?" I answered, rubbing the back of his left hand soothingly.

"I'm tired mom…." He said trailing off as he slipped into sleep.

"I'll take him," Edward offered, standing from our tight nit circle to lift Ant. "Why don't you go ahead and get yourself ready for bed; I'll be in in just a minute love."

"Okay," I agreed standing and kissing his lips softly, then turning a little to the right to kiss Anthony on the cheek and forehead.

I took my time getting ready for my first night in my home. I ran warm water in the bath tub for a nice long bath. I searched through my draws to take out my newly required blue silk night gown, something to wear after my bath. And I also took out Edwards dressing gown, hoping he would take that nice long bath with me.

"Babe?" Edward called out to me. "Are you in there?"

"Yeah, come in." I called back.

I'd just stepped out of the last of my clothing when he walked through the door. He watched, as if in a daze, as I climbed into the warm water and took a seat. I turned to his silent form and smiled tiredly.

"Are you going to join me or stay there and stare? I mean I know you like to watch baby, but I was hoping you'd join me on this one." I smirked, watching his clothes disappear from his body in less then twenty seconds.

"Move forwards." He directed. I leaned forwards, making room for him behind me. He settled pulling my back to his chest. "Ah," he sighed tiredly. "this feels like heaven."

"I know what you mean. This has been one of the most life altering days of my life so naturally it was exhausting. Hmm…" I hummed as he began to manipulate my shoulders.

"I'm so happy we did this. I've always dreamt of you and I sharing a home." He leaned down, placing a light kiss to my neck. "Having a child together, being with you forever."

"I had the same dreams, when we were children. Now I dream of moments to come with our family; Anthony graduating high school, college. Him leaving home, getting married. Myself waking up to you every morning and laying with you every night. Moments…"

"Perfect moments. I can't wait." Edward whispered into my shoulder.

That night we made love three times; once in the tub, me straddling him. The second time out of the tub; me bent over the sink, and the last time in the shower which we had to take because of our two times before. I'd never felt more loved then when Edward held me in his arms our fist night in our new home.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"We have two car accidents. The ambulances are within minutes of each other. The first is apart of a DD. The father and the son is in serious condition the wife and the daughter made it out without a scratch mark. The driver of the other car, the drunk, also made it out without a scratch." I turned towards Paul and looked at him stunned. My job was never easy, but working on kids in this profession has to be the hardest thing I'll ever do in life.

"I'm sorry, B." Paul said sympathetically.

"It's okay. What about the second?"

"The second was with a woman and a man, they were hit from the back and both were injured. Here comes the first ambulance. I'll take the first one." Paul offered, but it wasn't his responsibility to take and it wasn't apart of his job description to protect me.

"I have it. I'm going to need two stretchers and can someone page Doctor Cullen. Tell him to meet me in ER 6 on the second floor. Lets go, lets go, lets go."

In seconds my ER was full of commotion. When the first ambulance pulled up I ran to the doors, pulling them open and grabbing at the closest gurney to me. It was the little boy and there was blood everywhere; his face, his head, his chest, arms, legs. He was badly injured and I needed to go _now_.

"Ted!" I called, my assistant male nurse abandoning the father and letting the EMTs lift him out. "The boy. Help me lift and roll. They'll carry the father in and Doctor Cullen will take over from there. On my count; one…two…lift!" Ted and I lifted the young boy who was extremely silent.

"…I believe," Came the voice of an EMT from behind us. "That the boy has brain damage and a few broken ribs. His leg was trapped in the car door so we had to cut around it. When we got the door off, he began to bleed a great deal. We stopped it as best we could but it's still going. His face; cheeks, jaw, has pieces of broken glass embedded in his skin. He hit the window head on. He's also bleeding from some unlocated spot on his chest. There was just too much blood to pinpoint it. His arms were dislocated, but we were able to put one back in place. The right one has glass and we didn't want to risk infection"

"Thank you, we'll take it from here."

We entered the elevator and hit floor six in no less then twenty seconds. That's were Edward stumbled into us. One look at me and he knew that something beyond the obvious was wrong. But he kept it professional, as was I. "Doctor Swan, what can I do?"

"The father is right behind us. Take him into ER 5 and began working on him. You have Doctor Engaled and a few interns that are going to watch in on you. I'll be there as soon as possible."

"Yes Ma'am. Good luck Doctor Swan."

"You too Doctor Cullen."

Seconds after Edward entered ER 5 all hell broke out. "Doctor, he's coding!"

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

After almost ten hours of working on that young boy, who I now know as Julian Burnwell, I found myself in the Doctors lounge alone, in the dark, crying my eyes out. I'll never get the image of Julian's dead, lifeless body on that gurney out of my head; albeit he was only dead for a minute. Still, the image would never leave my mind….

After coding I fought my hardest to get him stabled, but nothing seemed to work. So I opened him up and massaged his heart. Then I shocked it directly. He was once again on line, but time was limited. That's when the image changed. But I put it to the back of my head and continued to work. I had to deal with his most life threatening injuries fast or I would have lost him, and I would not have been able to bring him back. During the surgery he bleed more than any normal boy of the age of ten should have. But I found each and every hole and fixed them. I'd never been more thankful for my ability with a scalpel in my life until that moment….

"Isabella?" Came Edwards' small comforting voice. "Isabella is that you?"

"Yes," I whispered hoarsely. "I'll be out in a few minutes Edward, I promise. Just give me a moment."

The door opened wider and Edward stepped through, his slim frame coming towards me. I didn't want him to see me like this. But it looked like I wasn't going to get a choice. "Isabella," He called once more as the light above finally flicked on. I blinked, my eyes adjusting to the light. "Baby," He whispered moving to my side. He scooped me up effortlessly and sat me on his lap, my head buried in his shoulder. He went quiet and after a second I just couldn't hold it.

"He died Edward." I cried.

"But you brought him back baby. You saved his life. You were amazing and so confident. I watched you from above when I was finished with his father. You were incredible Isabella."

"Do you know what I saw when I saw that little boys body lying there on that table lifeless? I saw Anthony the night I found him running through traffic."

"Bella-"

"I know, but I couldn't help it. The image just changed and suddenly I wasn't saving Julian anymore, I was saving Anthony. I was panicking Edward. I was inside that little boys body and I was a panicked mother instead of a professional surgeon. What you saw from above was just a robotic shell. On the inside I was a mess and I've never been that way before. I mean working on young kids always gave my heart a squeeze, but this time it was different. So very different."

"Okay, I want to show you something. So clean up your face and come meet me out-front. I'll be waiting."

"Edward I'm not in the mood for any surprises."

"This is not a surprise, trust me. Now clean yourself up and meet me out front asap." With a soft kiss to my temple he stood and set me on my feet. He was out of the room shortly after. I walked into the bathroom and went to the sink. I took a look at myself in the mirror and my insides were worse off. I ran cold water and splashed my face. With a brown paper towel I dried my face and walked through the lounge until I was outside of the door in front of Edward.

"That was fast." He comment before grabbing my hand and pulling me away.

"Well I wanted to get this over with." He nodded, walking through the hospital until we met the elevator. It opened up, seconds after Edward pressed the up button and we were on it and headed to the seventh floor. "Where are you taking me Edward?"

"I want to show you why you have nothing to worry about. Come on." He disappeared in room 328 and pulled me with him. The room was empty, besides the odd paint brush and ladder. This floor of the hospital was getting repainted to make the kids more comfortable here.

Edward walked through the room and entered the rest room, still pulling me along. Once I was in he closed the door, exposing the gaping hole that was in it. I looked at him accusingly and he shook his head.

"Apparently one of the painters did it when their boss refused to give him his check. Follow me."

"There is no way I'm going into that hole. There could be anything in there."

"Oh Bella come on." Edward called behind him as he climbed through the hole. Reluctantly I followed. I was so getting this hole filled in soon.

Through the hole was a small room and in the floor of the small room was one of those trash shoots. Like the one in -Home Alone 2. It was yellow and it went straight down. Edward jumped in and went down it.

"Edward!" I yelled looking down the whole. "Edward answer me!" I demanded.

"I'm fine love. Come on, jump down!"

"Edward there is no way in hell I'm doing that!"

"It's better than it looks. Come on Bella!"

"Edward-" I wined.

"Now Bella!" With a sigh and closed eyes I lunged myself down the opening. It was fast and exhilarating. The wind flew past me fast and I felt my cheeks grow hot. I wanted to do it again.

Not long after I landed in a small pool of foam. Edward was there to pick me up. "That was amazing." I told him excitedly.

"I thought you would think so. Come on, we're not far now."

I took his hand and he led me down a small hall and into a room off the right of the hall. Inside was a big empty space. There were windows and light showed through them. Not sun light, but light from a giant workers lamp. "What is this place?" I asked Edward.

"Look over there, in the corner." I glanced to my left, following Edwards' finger. There was a small shape huddled sound asleep in the corner. Anthony. He was in a small bed, surrounded by his toys and covered in one of his blankets that went missing over two months ago. "This is one of his new hiding places. He comes down here when the kids start to get on his nerves in the daycare."

"And you let him?" I asked disapprovingly.

"Of course." Edward answered sounding unabashed. "Under a few conditions of course. The first was to show me where this was, the second was to tell me when he was coming down, the third was that there was always more than one exit in case something happened and he had to get out. But that isn't why I asked you down here. I want you to look at him Isabella. Look at our son and tell me what you see."

I knew instantly what he wanted me to say, but I couldn't. He wanted me to say that Anthony was there, right in front of me and he was safe and content and sleeping peacefully, but I couldn't say it. I just couldn't say it. Instead I cried.

"Isabella." He cooed. "I promised you that I wouldn't let anything happen to him and I meant it. I will give my life before our son is the little boy on one of those operating tables. I know what happened today scared you, but you handled it beautifully. I promise you that Anthony will be safe, always…."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm sorry it took me so ling to update. Anyway, i hope you liked it.**


	15. The Cereal Aisle?

_**Blurry Lines: Chapter Fifteen**_

_**Edward**_

_Ding…Dong…._

Came the persistent sound of the Devils bell. Bella and Anthony were asleep so I quickly climbed out of bed and threw on my black robe that was thrown haphazardly over the brown chair in the corner of Bella and mines room.

With a yawn and a few very vivid words, I made my way toward the living room. Walking blindly was becoming-after stepping on one of Anthony's little blue hotrods- a hassle. So as I continued my journey I flicked on a few lights, illuminating my path through the walk way and into the living room.

As I entered the living room I glanced over at the clock on the wall; 2:15. Bella and I just barley closed our eyes. With exhaustion cloaking my body, I wrenched the door open and almost stumbled back what with who I found in front of me.

_Age_ and _time_ are two very different things. _Age_ is an era, a period. _Time_ is an occasion, an instance, a moment. Some say the two signifies the exact identical thing, but I beg to differ. Because at this instance, this moment, this _time age_ was rearing it's ugly head and mocking the individual in front of me.

I couldn't help but let a small grin slither onto my face as I took in every wrinkle, every blemish and every flaw related with aging upon her all too familiar face. For someone who was obsessed with staying young forever, she sure did miss the memento that floated around about what make-up could do for your most prominent facial flaws.

"Renee, what can I do for you?" I asked flatly, my face sobering up and taking on a hard edge.

"Where is my daughter? Bring her out here now!" She demanded hysterically, her words slurring.

"Are you drunk?" I asked as her breath hit my face violently smelling of Jack and a few other unnamables.

"And it matters why? Where is that bitch!" She asked taking a step towards me.

"I'm only going to tell you this once. You will not call her out of her name, ever again. Do you understand me you hag? You don't get to come here and demand anything of us. You are not welcomed here. I will call and pay for you a cab and you will get in it and go as far from here as you came. I never want to see or hear of you ever again. And if you ever so much as breathe her name again I will personally make sure that your life is as fucked up as you made hers all those years ago. Do you understand me?"

"Edward?" came Isabella's soft whisper from behind me. I stiffened and squared my shoulders, blocking Renee who'd stood up on tiptoes to peer over me. "Edward, what's going on? Who's at the door?" she asked tiredly. I could hear her footsteps as she approached me.

"No one babe, go back to sleep." Ignoring me, she continued to come forwards.

"Edward, it's almost three in the morning. We have a big shift tonight. Come back to bed."

"Yeah Edward, go back to bed." Renee sneered. There was a gasp behind me, and as if in slow motion Bella's hand reached out to touch my arm and she brought herself directly in the line of fire. "Aw, there you are."

"What are you doing here Renee?" Bella demanded. Her voice and body language much harder than I thought either one would be.

"Can't a mother come and see her _whore_ of a daughter." Bella winced, taking a step back and running into my body. I pulled her frame to mine and nearly closed the door right in Renee's face, but Bella-who must have guessed my plan-stopped me.

"What do you want?" Bella asked firmly.

"You owe me, remember? You're indebted to me. I came for payment."

"I don't owe you anything you twisted bitch. Get off of our property before I cut you with the sharpest scalpel I have. And don't you ever come back."

With that Bella slammed the door in her face and began heading towards our room. Through the door Renee had began to yell. "I'll tell him!" She threatened, making Bella stop in her tracks. "Give me what I want or I'll tell him and those nice little Cullen's your so fond of!" She yelled as she banged on the door. "Did you hear me you bitch? I'll tell them all, starting with lover boy there!"

Bella's body was now visibly shaking; her earlier display of bravery completely gone as she turned around, her eyes meeting my questioning ones. Whatever Renee had on her had her plainly traumatized. And the fear and pain in her eyes made me go to her quickly, but she shook me off.

"Let her in." She whispered. I shook my head, refusal. "Please Edward, just let her in."

"Tell me what she's talking about, _now_." I requested, my fist clenching tightly.

"I can't. Please, just let her in." She begged.

"_Can't_, I hate that word coming out of your mouth. You can do _anything_ and you know it." She shook her head, a tear, sneaking down her cheek. "Bella, Bella, she can do it, she can do what no one can." I sung. It was something I'd made up when we were little. Every time she said she couldn't I'd sing that for her and she'd find the strength to do it. Because I was there for her, and as she would say, I had faith in my heart.

"Edward-"

"Just _tell_ me Isabella, _now_."

"You'll look at me differently. I don't want that."

With a sigh I took a few steps toward her; once close enough I reached out and pulled her to me, flesh against flesh. "I could never look at you as anything other then the mother to our son and the woman I love. Whatever you tell me will not and can not change that. So start spilling Isabella."

With a sniffle and a shuddering breath, she began. "The first time that they took me, when we were fourteen, they brought me back to a house in Tennessee. I'd never been, so I tried to imagine something good about it, maybe the sites, the animals, something. But once we were there things did not turn out as I'd though they would. That was the first time he'd looked at me differently, Phil."

I stiffened, my arms tightening around her protectively. "He didn't…"

"Not that time." She whispered back. "He just looked. I would walk into a room and his eyes would follow me. It frightened me so mach that I told Renee. She laughed at me and told me to stop being a little whore. I never told her again. Years went by and I started to develop. Curves here and there, boobs, an actual rear-end. I was becoming a woman, and he took notice, but he waited.

"On the night before the morning of my eigthteenth birthday I guess he got tired of waiting, of looking. Renee was drunk somewhere trying to regain her youth so it was just him and I in the house. I was in my room and he was somewhere on the other side of the house, or so I thought. I woke up to this pressure on my chest. It was around 11:40 at night. Of course it was him. He'd taken the honor in raising down my shirt and bra while I was sleeping. His mouth was attached to my chest, sucking at my nipples.

"I told him to stop, to get off, but he wouldn't. His hands began to roam, his fingers going into my baby blue night shorts. I bit my lip as I struggled against him, but he was so strong. He touched me down there, his fingers crawling lower and lower, but he never put his fingers in me. Somehow I found the strength and the room to kick him in the balls. He rolled off of me and I ran for the door. He'd locked it, of course, but I got out and ran straight to Alice's house. I told her everything and she wanted to call the cops, but I told her to wait until tomorrow because I was just so tired. By the time the cops got there the next day he was gone, Renee with him. I never knew what he told her, but I knew that he would lie about it.

"Thanks to Alice I was able to get over it. She made me see that my body was mine and that it was my right to tell him no. You're the only person that I've _ever_ allowed to touch me intimately Edward. And I'm happy about that."

"I'm proud of you babe. So very proud." I reassured her. "And Alice is right; this is yours to do with as you please. No one should ever touch you against your will. And the fucker that ever does again will answer to me. What does she want from you?"

"Probably money or something, I have no idea. I haven't seen her in years."

"We are not giving her money. And she's not walking in this house. I made a promise that nothing evil will ever walk through those doors. And I'm keeping it. How she found us, I don't know, but she won't be back after tonight. Okay?" I asked as I lifted her face, her eyes meeting mine.

"Alright." she whispered back, her lips lifting just a bit in a small smile.

"Why don't you go climb in bed with Anthony for a while? I'm going to get dressed and get her to a hotel or something."

"Okay, I love you."

"As I love you." I kissed her softly and watched her as she made her way to our sons' room.

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

I drove two hours straight to get Renee away from my family. That was the furthest I could drive without being late to work. By the time I made it home to shower Bella and Anthony were gone. Bell left me a note on her pillow telling me that she was at work and Anthony was at school. She would have waited for me but Anthony would have been late to school and she didn't want to be home alone. I understood, and later I would have to reaffirm that she still felt safe in her own home.

I made it to work with fifteen minutes to kill. I went to the cafeteria and stood in line for a black coffee. I was craving it after the morning I had. Renee was a bitch the entire time I drove her to a motel 8 I knew was a few miles from the 'Thank you for visiting' sign that was located on the way out of the state. That's how far I got in two hours, almost out of town. I dumped her there and turned back to get home to my family.

I'd just made it to the on call room when Jessica Stanley, a nurse who I was very much starting to despise, walked up to me. She wore her always-hopeful smile and flipped her hair behind her back before asking me her regular question. "So, I was wondering if you would join me for dinner tonight?"

I sighed, which was apart of my regular response, and shook my head. "Jessica, I really appreciate the offer, really, I do-but I'm not interested."

"Are you like gay or something?" She asked bluntly.

I choked on my coffee, my eyes watering. I heard a small teasing laugh behind me, and turned to see Isabella standing there with her hands over her mouth. I glared-then biting my lip-pleaded with my eyes for her to help me out.

With a roll of her eyes and a heavy sigh, she walked up to me-pulling my face to hers and kissing me square on the lips. There was a furious sigh from our side, but Bella only smiled and deepened our kiss. I dropped my coffee cup, pulling her to me and gave just as much as she was giving.

She pulled away with dark eyes and swollen lips. "Gay," she said, turning to Jessica. "he is _not_. The proof _is_ our son. Interested in you…again, he is _not_. But he really, really does appreciate it. It's like an ego boost or something when random trollops walk up and ask him out. Isn't that right babe?"

"Um…yeah, random trollops." I said still in a daze from our kiss. A screech picked me out of my trance-like-state and I watched as Jessica stormed away. "What just happened?"

"You know…the usual. The entire hospital is going to know that we're sleeping together now. Unfortunately she's going to ignore the fact that your Anthony's _father_." She said the last bit loudly in the direction Jessica ran off in. "Oh well, I guess it was bound to happen." Sighing and turning back to me, she brought her hand up to my face, tucking the loose hair there behind my left ear. "How did it go…with Renee?" she asked nervously.

"She was in and out of it the entire time I drove. She constantly insulted me and honestly, I wanted to throw her out of my moving car. She's still the same as she was all those years ago. How are you doing?" I asked cautiously. I hope this wasn't going to be a step back for us.

"I'm fine. I just wish she were it and Phil doesn't come looking for me too." I pulled her to me, hugging her closely. "Anyway, Anthony didn't hear anything which is just great. I don't want him around those people. He missed you this morning, though. He was all pouty because he didn't get to see his daddy this morning before he went to school. You know his birthday is coming up?"

"How can I forget? He's seven going on sixteen on October 1st and he won't let me forget it." I smiled remembering the conversation we had last week. Anthony was adamant on the fact that I owed him at least seven late birthday presents. I laughed, but he was very serious for a seven-year-old.

"What do you think we should do?" Isabella asked. I hunched my shoulders. I'd never given a kid a party, let alone my own.

"I think this is more your territory. What do you think he'd like?"

"Oh no. I planed the first seven, you get this one." She said backing out of my arms.

"How about you help me out a little? Since it's October that means we can do a little with Halloween stuff. How about a costume party? Have you done one of those for him yet?" she shook her head 'no.' "Well, we can do that and invite the kids from the daycare and his class at school. What do you think?"

"Perfect." She praised. "See, I knew you could do this parenting thing. Um…but on September 30th we have to have a family dinner. He always have one, as in it's a tradition I started for him. This year he'll have more family there. He'll love that."

"Yeah," I agreed. "he will. We should probably go before we get accused of being inappropriate in the on call room." She laughed, nodding her head before kissing my jaw. I smiled and watched her walk away, my favorite activity. But then I remembered about the dinner I wanted make for her tonight to have our conversation.

"Bell!" I yelled after her. "After work I'm not going to be home right away." She stopped turning around to ask why. I jogged over to her, not wanting anyone else in our personal business. "I'm going to head to the store. I'll take Ant with me so don't worry about going to the daycare after you're off."

"I get off like thirty minutes after you so I'll just see you guys at home."

"Why don't you just meet us at the store then? I can take your car and drive it home. Ant and I can take the bus to the store and by the time you get off and get to the store in the Volvo we'll just be getting there. We can drive home at the end of the day together."

"I think I'll like that. See you later and give Ant a kiss for me."

_**-~~'\\%/'~~-**_

"Dad, can I get out of the basket when we get to aisle three?" Anthony asked as he and I strolled through the automatic doors of 'Main Market.'

"What's on isle three?"

"Cereal." I turned seeing my beautiful girl walk in the door behind us. "He always wants to get out on the cereal aisle. Hey boys." She greeted, kissing Ant on the cheek and me on the lips. "What do you guys say we get this over with so we can get home?"

Shopping with Anthony and Isabella was a blast. She would put something healthy and nutritious into the basket and Anthony would put something far too unhealthy in the basket to cancel out her healthy choice. And as soon as he wasn't paying attention Bell took all of his items out and replaced them with more healthy items. I laid back and smiled as they went, picking up something every now and then.

"Dad, it's coming up, can you take me out now?"

I smiled, picking him up and placing him on his feet. He took off onto the next isle, Bella hot on his heels. "Just two Ant." I heard her tell him as I entered the isle.

"But this one has the new transformers."

"Ant, two." She stated firmly. Looking over the different oatmeal brands.

"But…." Anthony whispered glumly looking up at all of the different cereal boxes. "We have to get Apple Jacks. We always do. And we have to get Captain Crunch because he's the captain. And we have to get Fruit Loops because they have Transformers."

"Two Anthony. " She insisted.

"But mom…."

"Edward, please talk to your son." She exclaimed as she picked up Quicker oats and walked to aisle four.

"Dad," Anthony called, ready to bargain.

"How about this kiddo. We get the Captain and we get the Jacks. As for the toy…how about you and I go to the toy store tomorrow while moms at work? We can see if they have the toy there. You don't need to get an extra thing of cereal. So grab the Captain and the Jacks and lets go find mom."

Mom was on aisle six. Anthony went to her, tugging on her arm and when she turned to him, he gave her leg a warm hug. She thanked him, ruffling his hair and giving him and I a wink.

"So," she started before glancing at Anthony at the end of the isle. "how did you get him to pick only two?"

"I bribed him with promises of a new toy." She rolled her eyes with a small smile.

"Thanks for that."

"You're welcome." I wrapped my arms around her as we walked down the isle, our basket abandoned for the moment.

"Dad," Anthony whispered, coming up to me and Isabella.

"Yeah," I whispered back, letting go of Bella. He motioned for me to step closer to him and I did. I bent down on one knee, pulling him closer to me.

"There's a guy over there," He motioned with his little green seven-year-old eyes. "and he's taking pictures of me." My eyes snap up instantly. But Anthony pulled my hair and I winced focusing back on him. "I want to go home." I nodded, smiling big so he wouldn't feel so afraid.

"Okay, lets get mom and check out so we can go home." He agreed and we walked over to Bella, got our basket and made it to a check out line. Every now and again, I'd glance around and sure enough the same guy, face slightly covered by glasses and a hat was still taking pictures of Anthony, but not just him. Bella and me as well, all of us.

Why would someone want to take pictures of our family?


	16. Skizzy's

**_Blurry Lines: Chapter Sixteen_**

**_Edward_**

Isabella was beyond consolable.

She was freaking out as she paced the span of our hotel room. Yeah, that's right, a hotel room. There was no way I was going home with some asshole on our tail.

Anthony, thankfully, went right to sleep upon entering the hotel room. I woke him minutes later, feeding him fast food, then put him back to sleep. He was exhausted by tonight's activities.

"What are we going to do Edward, who could possibly want to follow us?" Isabella asked nervous and confused.

"Maybe it's someone with your mother. There is no way that her reappearance and this isn't tied."

"My mother already knows where we live. She wouldn't have had to have us followed. She could just show up at the house again. Oh god, maybe it's Phil. Maybe he's after me again. Maybe my mother was just a decoy, to see if she could get close to me. Why is this happening?"

"I don't know babe. I really don't know. But I have a plan, and I need Jasper."

"What exactly do you need Jasper for? If what you are thinking is going to bring him in this then no. He has Alice and Hailey to think about, we can't bring him into this Edward."

"Well, do you have a better plan? All we need is a diversion and then you and Anthony can get out of here, go home."

"What about you?" she asked panicked.

"I'd distract him. I'd take our car and go to a bar or something while Jasper brings you and Anthony home. I'll lose the tail and get home as soon as possible."

"And what if this doesn't work? What if he's been following us for days, and knows where we live and work, where Ant goes to school? God Edward, whoever this is could have been at this for a while. They could know our entire life story already."

"I know, but if they don't, I don't want to put you or Anthony into a situation where whoever the hell that is can find you. Let me do this Isabella. Let me protect my family."

"If anything-if anything happens to-" She began nervously.

"It won't." I interrupted my tone solid.

"You can't be sure of that. Promise me you will be careful." She demanded.

"I will."

"Promise." She begged.

"I promise you that I will be crazy careful. Let me call Jasper, okay? As soon as I get something sorted I'll get you guys out of here."

Jasper was more than a little helpful. He readily volunteered to help me get my family out of this mess, putting his own family at risk. I did not take this lightly. For someone to do this for us was beyond amazing.

He met Isabella and a sleep hazed Anthony in the garage of the hotel. I'd parked on the street and we'd walked through the front door, but I'd advised Jasper to meet us in the garage. He'd wait for my call, telling him that I was being followed by whoever the hell it was following me.

And when I left, I did just that. The guy didn't seem to mind that I was alone, his car a black Mercedes Benz. He followed me for twenty minutes before I stopped in the parking lot of _Skizzy's_. A bar about two blocks down from the hospital.

Once I entered the bar I'd waited for ten minutes at the bar before glancing around, looking for my shadow. I found him easily in the darkest corner of the bar. There was no way I was getting out of here without him noticing. Pulling out my phone, I called home.

"Edward," Isabella, whispered on an exhale. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, perfectly fine. How are you and Anthony, you get home okay?"

"Yeah, Jasper got us home and he's staying until you come. He refuses to leave us alone."

"That's good, I don't want you two home alone. Tell him thanks."

"I will. Now give me an update. What's happening?"

"I'm at _Skizzy's_, down the street from the hospital. He's sitting in a corner of the bar watching me. I don't know, babe. If I want to ditch him I'll have to do something dramatic, but I'm not big on what I actually have planed."

"And what's that?" She asked curiously.

"Start a fight with someone here and slip out through the back door."

"Edward," she sighed frustrated.

"I know I know, I'm too _old_ for that kind of behavior, but I just want to get home to my family. This can't keep going on."

"You're right. Isn't this against the law or something? Can't we just call the police?"

"There's not much the cops can do. They arrest him and then what, hours later he's back on our tail. I need to know why he's following us."

"Edward, I know that voice. Don't you do anything st-"

"Love, I have to go." I disconnected the call before she could finish, already knowing what she was going to say. But this was not about to continue. "Sir?" I greeted as I took a seat at his table. Removing his glasses and cap, he looked straight into my eyes.

My first thought was that I knew the guy from somewhere. My second was from where do I know him, and my third was what in hell will it take to get rid of him. "My name is Edward Cullen, you are?"

"Not important."

"I'd say the name of the guy who is terrifying my family is very important. So you are?"

He smiled, digging into his pocket and pulling out a card. He flipped it across the table and I read it, surprised. "I'm sure you understand now." He spoke.

"A PI? Who would hire you to follow me and my family?"

"I can't discuss my client Mr. Cullen. So ask me something else."

"Why are you following my family, what do you want to know?"

"I'm following your family because I was paid to follow them-and _you_. I need to know everything."

"Look, this is ridiculous. We haven't done anything that warrants someone wanting to know. Why would anyone follow me, or Isabella, or Anthony. Why would anyone want to know about the girl I love and the son we share? That Anthony climbs through holes in the wall, or that Isabella eats pudding on Thursday's just because, or that I shave everyday or else I'll look like a damn goat. Why would someone…." Then it clicked, all of it clicked. Like an unexpected thunderstorm, the memory rolled in. It's her, I know it's her…

_"I know you're going to _her_. But guess what, I'll be there. The day you think you're the happiest is the day I'll rip it all away. Right in front of your face, I will rip it all away you bastard. You better hope she isn't there when it happens."_

"You go back to your … _client,_ and you tell her to leave me the fuck alone. Tell her crazy ass that we are and was always _done_ before we ever begun. And then you tell her that if she comes anywhere near my girl or my son, that I will personally slap a harassment suit against her ass that she'll be seeing stars for the rest of her fucking life. Then you tell her that It's not my fucking fault that she was never _it_ for me."

I don't know how far I got before he caught up to me and pulled me out the bar door and down the street to my car. "Look, since you've figured it out Mr. Cullen I have a nice piece of advise for you. Get out of time for a few days and just…I don't know, have a vacation with your family."

"Why?" I demanded, wrenching my arm from his tight grip. "Why should I do something like that? I have a job, my girl has a job and my kid has school. That's not even possible right now."

"Make it possible. Look, I have had plenty of clients before. Lot's of strange, desperate, delusional clients, but _nothing_ like this. She walks into my office one day, slams ninety-nine gran on my desk, hands me your full name, social and your parent's whereabouts. She says you're her husband and she knows you've been cheating on her for months-if not years. She says that if you're not at your parents place then you're with your mistress, a one Isabella Swan.

"Now, my method is to always look into my clients and my subject's background. See if anything I've been told is legit or if it's some make believe bullshit. I tell her this and she slams down another twenty gran for full disclosure on you, but full closure on herself. I say fine, fuck her background run. I mean the money was good and I have a new kid at home so I went with it. I took her case.

"The first time I reported to her in person, it was like watching a kid hanging on every word of their favorite parent. Her eyes were bright with glee when your name would be mentioned and then they would darken with this…I don't know, evil, demonic _hate_ when I mentioned Isabella's name. It was nothing I'd ever seen before and to be honest with you it gave me the fucking he-bee-gee-bees just to be in the same room with her anymore.

"Tonight was my last conversation with her and it wasn't pretty. See, I've only been following you for the last few months. But Tonight was the first time I told her anything about Anthony and that was by accident. I knew she should never find out about your boy. The hate in which she spoke of his mother with was my first clue. I thought by not telling her about him I was at least doing something right. But I slipped up tonight. And now she knows.

"She went ballistic over the phone man. I mean, I heard crashing and yelling, and ripping in the background. Then, right before the phone hung-up I heard her yell something along the lines of, 'He's going to fucking pay-all of them. And I swear on the life of my child that theirs will too.' I don't know what the fuck that means, but it didn't sound pretty. I've tried calling her back, but she won't answer. It's freaking me the fuck out and not a lot of things can do that shit. So just…I don't know, take my advice. Get out of town for a while. Take your family on a short vacation. Just go, give me time to find her-talk her down or some shit."

Sighing, and rubbing my face harshly I nodded. "I can't believe this shit is happening. When everything seems so fucking perfect, she comes along with her bullshit and my family's being disrupted again. Un-fucking-believable. But you know what, this time I'm not going to walk away with what's due to me…no, this time she'll walk through hell if _any_ harm comes to my family."

* * *

><p><strong><em>AN:<em> **I know that I have been MIA and no, I don't have an excuse. What I do have is a reason, well three. First, I fell in love-with a story-of course...lol...It's called **_Blood & Glory_** and it's by **_drotuno_** and it's fucking amazing. Anyway, I found out while reading the third book-**Smoke & Mirrors** that there was actually a first book, **_Blood & Glory_** and a second book, _**Sin & Innocence**_ and of course the third-which I'd started first-**Smoke & Mirrors**. So, for the last month or so I've been catching up on these stories instead of writing and I can't say that I'm sorry. In all actuality-I'm a bigger fan of reading these stories then writing them, but I write for the people who love to read. Makes sense? I hope so 'cause I feel I'm rambling. Anywho, I hope you liked the chapter and of course everyone knows who the crazy ass woman is. Goodnight :)


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